Confusion and Uncertainty

2011

2011-01-09T18:05:00.002+08:00

Alright i'm back here to see how my blog is rotting.

Welcome 2011! A new decade/year to begin with. A new start. And i'll work hard, doubly, triply or whatever it takes to get to where i want.

It was a good 2 years in army where i've went through pretty much lots of ups and downs, and i've grown defintely. So you're looking at the new me, seriously. Don't expect to take up too much of my time if you ain't worth it.

So it's the year i'm turning 21. Not going to do up a big celebration at chalets or what, i'll probably just do a close door event with my close friends. Wondering what's the big hype of turning 21. Well, I wouldn't mind presents if you're more than willing to give. LOL!

And I guess i've been quite influenced by my elder brother recently. So now i'm totally into gadgets and technological stuff. So i'm really looking forward to getting my own laptop, razor keyboard and mouse. *HINT HINT* you can google on the razor blackwidow ultimate. =p

I'm going to do a cleanup to my room and my stuff. Most importantly, my life. And to all those who are still walking down the emo path, it's time to move on as things won't change if you're continuously looking back.

When the two of you first got together, breaking up was tough.
When the two of you broke up, getting over it was tougher.
When you get over it, erasing that part of your memory is the toughest.

P.S. eh bro, you should clean up all the remnants of your past as well. LOL!

out of the blue..

2010-08-02T00:42:00.002+08:00

Ok. I realised florists are flooding my tagboard. So i'm here to post something to deter them from spamming my tagboard. Hopefully it helps.

Well, it's been a good 7 months since i last blogged. Just too lazy to blog nowadays. And also because I don't feel like writing things down. But i'm here today at least. So it's 3 months away from the big O. Feels so near yet so far. Then comes another problem, gotta start finding work to do. Sigh. Humans are so contradictive. The good thing is that i will not wear green at least. oh wells.

Journey to adulthood enters yet another phase. Gotta sign up for ACCA. Not sure if i'm making a good decision. And i'm not sure if i can make it. But if i don't try, i'll neer know right. Taking a step into the dark, hoping everything will be alright. Uni is like starting next year august. Totally don't feel like going back into studying. Guess i'm too used to 'enjoying' life in the army, without having to think and worry bout studies and results. Should just sign on and stay in the army. haha.

I hope to make it big someday. I wanna live a life where i can at least enjoy certain luxuries. Don't wanna live my life in vain. So i'm going to work hard for my future. Not going to waste my time anymore.

new year.

2010-01-10T17:26:00.003+08:00

Always feel like blogging but yet lazy to get down to blogging. Oh well, first and foremost, happy new year to all! 10 days late but nonetheless still my best wishes. haha. So It's been an eventful 2009 and hopefully this year will be much better! And yes, ORD year! 10 months to go.

I guess my first resolution for the new year would be to get both my licences! haha. Bike's one in Jan, Driving's in Feb. So pray for me! For some reason, i ain't that confident as my TP gets closer. Oh well, just hope things go well for me.

Then secondly, i need to start saving up! Damn. i'm spending more than what i'm getting for allowance in the army. To think that i wanted to save up since i entered army. But biking and driving did take a toll on my expenses. Not forgetting the occasional socialising outings. LOL! that aside, i still can't figured how i spend so much. Oh well, now that i've 10 months left to go, i better save save and SAVE!

That's the only 2 resolutions i have for now. I've decided that i will not resolve to getting a gf this year. haha! Shall stay single and enjoy myself first. At least till uni, then i will start openning up my options. So can contact my secretary to start taking queue numbers. JUST KIDDING! ok jokes aside, this 2010 didn't really start off on a good note, so i just hope it gets better and better. yeah. To everyone out there, may your wishes come true in 2010!

XMAS!

2009-12-26T02:14:00.002+08:00

Merry Xmas to all!

And this year christmas has officially ended 2 hours ago. Well, it didn't start on the correct note as well since i was doing guard duty on the christmas eve. Damn. Sucks totally.. Oh well, the only reason that i could think of that can explain why i didn't have the festive mood is probably coz i didn't spend it with friends these year, save for my army mates. LOL! Besides that, being single also made me realise that Xmas is a season of giving, to myself. haha.. Jokes aside, i did have that tinge of jealousy when i see couples taking a stroll down the streets during this festive season. Then again, singlehood still rocks totally!

I've decided that the next few things i wanna get would burn a hole in my pocket seriously. So i'm gonna start saving. For some reason, i haven't been able to save much for the past few months due to going for bike and driving lessons etc. And not forgetting the money spent on pampering myself at times. But this is all for a good cause, so that my life would be better in the future. HAHAHA! self delusion. screw it. I've decided that it's not totally worth it to sacrifice all the present, in order to gain just a little more in the future. It's hard to find the balance, but you just gotta try.

Today i received a card from a very good friend of mine. I could recognise the handwriting even before i open the card. So shocked for that moment. But i knew she's one of the very few that would make the effort to do such things. Sad to say, she's gonna leave singapore for overseas studies. Sigh.. I'm so going to miss her when she's gone. And i'll remember how i used to rant and whine to her about everything under the sun.. There goes one very good listener and advisor.. And if you happen to be the one that i'm referring to, i just wanna say, thanks for always being there when i need you.

And yes, to EUNICE my bro, i know results have kinda affected you lately, but keep your head up man! Don't tell me you're gonna let such a small thing take you down.. Cheer up alright! Work harder the next sem, and i'm pretty sure you're gonna do much much much MUCH BETTER! =D

Last but not least, to the birthday girl who happens to have a her birthday on xmas day itself, happy 18th birthday! you can finally go club with ur own IC. haha. and yeah, life isn't all about finding a partner man.. Don't need to always be so emo as well.. keep smiling!

title-less

2009-12-17T01:29:00.003+08:00

Decided to come back after leaving this blog to rot for a good 4 months.. And i revived the tagboard as well.

These 4 months had been a roller coaster ride i would say. So much has happened and so much changes had occurred. I can't find a point to start from so i shall skip the details. Well, i've finally gotten my 3rd sergeant rank. But with greater power comes greater responsibility, and greater shit awaits. The only thing that i can look forward to would be the backpay at least. Gonna save up for my bike, hopefully. It was and still is, my dream to ride a sports bike. 1 month more to go to TP, god bless me eh. And driving TP is 2 months from now, figured that i ain't really cut out for driving yet. haha. Hope things will turn for the better soon.

And so, weekends have been really short. Duties and duties and duties have taken up so many of my weekends. In addition to driving and biking lessons, totally dun feel like i have a life now seriously. Need to really spend time catching up with friends when things start to tone down.. sigh..

Sometimes i feel so tired but there ain't a shoulder for me to lean on.

i need to unwind.

Tik Tok

Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy
(Hey, what up girl?)
Put my glasses on, Im out the door - Im gonna hit this city (Lets go)
Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
Cause when I leave for the night, I aint coming back
Im talking - pedicure on our toes, toes
Trying on all our clothes, clothes
Boys blowing up our phones, phones
Drop-toping, playing our favorite cds
Pulling up to the parties
Trying to get a little bit tipsy

[CHORUS]
Dont stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, Imma fight
Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the click
But the party dont stop
Woah-oh oh oh
Woah-oh oh oh

[Chorus]

Aint got a care in world, but got plenty of beer
Aint got no money in my pocket, but Im already here
Now, the dudes are lining up cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger
Im talking about - everybody getting crunk, crunk
Boys trying to touch my junk, junk
Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk
Now, now - we goin til they kick us out, out
Or the police shut us down, down
Police shut us down, down
Po-po shut us -
[Chorus] x 2
DJ, you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up
You got me now
You gotta that sound
Yea, you got me
DJ, you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up
Get your hands up
Put your hands up
No, the party dont stop until I walk in

[Chorus] x 2

walking down memory lane..

2009-08-23T19:45:00.000+08:00

Went back VJ last monday to collect my A' level cert. The whole journey there simply reminded me of the past when i used to took that route to school every morning. Seeing students in the cream coloured uniform with some not tucking in the shirt just made me feel like i'm part of them. haha. Not to say that i dun tuck in my shirt eh. And walking into the school compound, i realised that i really really miss VJ. Never had i felt such a strong feeling for the school. Maybe that's what they meant by you will only cherish the times spent when you look back in time. And i was looking back at all the friendster comments and messages too. haha. Some were really hilarious i would say, and some i didn't even rmb what happened. But nonetheless, they were something that i could look back at and laugh it off i guess?

So ytd's party ended prematurely, due to this friend of mine getting himself all wasted. Lie on the ground and vommitted all over. I told myself i will never get myself in that situation. And i'm starting to get tired of clubbing, for some reason. haha. Believe it or not, it's up to you. Oh well, it's probably just an avenue to destress.

As for army, life's still ain't getting any easier. Outfield after outfield. This coming outfield is the last, for now. Hope i can tahan the 3 days. Praying hard that i won't collapse outfield eh. After this week all will be peaceful for some time at least.

I don't like people tagging under anonymous btw. And i dunno how you get the impression from my post that looks are everything. Honestly speaking, it will play a part in some way or another, whether you want it or not, but it's definitely not the crunch factor to me. So please do not misinterpret eh. =)

So it's probably another hour or so before i leave home for camp. And it's gonna be the same old shit again. Weekends always seemed to pass so much faster. And i'm lacking in sleep. Off to settle some stuff and pack my bag. Till then, cya folks!

Sometimes i wonder.

2009-08-17T01:49:00.000+08:00

So it's been a week of ups and downs. Next week ain't gonna be easy, neither will the following week. But i will survive, i hope. And my poor knee better buck up eh. Stupid 10km screwed my knee for some unknown reason. sigh.

Alright, last min decision to club on fri. This time didn't have my usual khakis with me eh. But nonetheless it was awesome! And my friend almost became cinderella in the club. lols. Oh well, all i know was that the next morning i almost couldn't wake up in time for my bike lesson. The mini hangover took me a good 5 mins of sitting right up in my bed before i could go and bathe. haha. So moral of the story, dun club if i'm gonna go for bike lesson the next morning.

Oh i caught jack neo's latest movie, 'where got ghosts'. It was quite hilarious, with the local touch of coz. Although there are certain parts which are quite dumb, i would still say it's a watchable family film. lols. So if you understand hokkien, and looking for a movie to laugh it off, go catch it!

ok random thought for the past few days. The next gf that i'm gonna get, i would still wan her to be able to bake cookies for me. On top of that, i wan her to be pretty. haha. This might sound kinda shallow, BUT i just can't stand seeing other guys with pretty girlfriends. LOL! call it jealous, envy, whatsoever. Next girl that i'm gonna say that she's my gf, i wan her to be able to turn heads. This is totally random. Not hinting anything either. But i'm single, yes! haha. Just that i guess i'm not available. YET. no particular reason.

And for some reason, people around me are emo-ing more and more eh. haha. And this's is not a good sign. I'll try my best to cheer you all up! I wan my friends to be happy, and that would probably be the best reason for me to continue smiling when times are hard. =) gd nite people!

p.s this might be a rather emo post, but i'm not emo-ing hor. haha.

STUCK AT HOME

2009-08-07T17:08:00.000+08:00

It sucks totally to be stuck at home. Haiz. All becoz i had a sudden onset of high fever, they sent me home for 7 days and effectively killed off my long weekend. Haiz. Worse is, i am suspected to have h1n1. Argh! Oh well.. To think that i wanted to fall sick last time, but now i realise it might not be that fun after all. So today marks the end of the all-feared tekong trip, which i missed out on the last 2 days. Hope i didn't lose out much..

Oh yeah, becoz they have to send me home straight from tekong, my phone and wallet and everything else was left in camp. So i'm like cut off from civilisation for these few days. So if you are trying to contact me, either you find me online (which most probably i will be) or call my house yeah. I've spent the whole day online play games and surfing the net, till i'm so bored. RARH!

End of the good days.

2009-07-08T20:13:00.002+08:00

It's the end of bike course. And yeah i got my class 2B military license finally! Not without a couple of falls and bumpy moments of coz. Well, all good things come to at end. Today marks the end of my stay-out course, and also the end of the good days. What lies ahead of me is not just shit, it's loads of shit! Have to go back to camp in like less than an hour's time. ARGH!

I've been thinking of getting a civilian bike license since i already have a military one. So I'm gonna check out my schedule over the next couple of weeks and perhaps slot in time to get myself enroll in some driving school. Yet at the same time i wanna get my driving license too. Sigh.. And i've been contemplating getting a 'new' army phone. Hm.. Maybe after getting my pay in 2 days time then i'll go get it. Then again, i want a bicycle. Gosh.. My wants are getting more and more costly. Oh well..

Once a failure doesn't mean always a failure yeah. It applies to driving too. =)

So yeah, i better go get change and prepare to leave house. GOD BLESS ME.

pain is only temporary.

2009-06-21T18:14:00.002+08:00

Decided to give my blog a breath of life so here i am.

It has been some time since i played in a 5 on 5 competitive game. And today i did it twice in a row, yeah i did pay a price for it though. haha. Got cuts here and there, the worst being a knock to my tailbone. The referee sucks big time. lols. It was great playing on the court as usual, kinda miss the feeling huh. Oh well, I did have fun catching up with my old friends.

Yeah, 2 weeks into my bike course already. 2 weeks more to go. It's been tiring everyday, travelling back and forth plus riding the whole day. And my saturdays aren't spared as well. Worse than staying in camp in fact. And the bike doesn't cooperate with me at times. haha. Just hope that i can pass all the tests that's coming up.

Oh yeah, went for the Mizuno 10km run last week up mount faber. Didn't know that mount faber was quite challenging. LOL! It was a great run nonetheless, and i'm gonna join more runs in future. Not forgetting the standard chartered one. Finisher of 42.195km. That's wat i wanna be. Haven really been running these 2 weeks coz of the high fatigue level everday. Damn.

And yes, i went to my first ever ladies night at rebel that day. The crowd was damn huge. 5 free drinks and free entry for ladies, who won't wanna go? haha. All sorts of shapes and sizes also have! But the sad part is, they can only get drinks 1 at a time. So yeah my friends just kept queing for the sake of the free drinks. Then it was non-stop all the way till 3 plus in the morning. By the time i reach home, i had less than an hour of sleep before i go for my bike course. Almost knocked out that day i swear, so moral of the story, next time should get mc. LOL!

Well, to my 2 jies out there, sorry that i didn't have time to meet you all lately. Missed playing ball with you 2. Treat you 2 to eat the next time yeah! banana prata and wat else? =D Then to my dear emo bro! Don't say i never update my blog huh. haha. Owe you 1x entry to rebel, zirca or lunar. you choose you want to enter by which club. LOL!

And i'm in love with this song currently!

Kiss Me Thru The Phone

Soulja Boy Tell 'Em

Baby you know that I miss you,
I wanna get with you tonight
But I cannot baby girl and that's the issue
Girl you know I miss you,
I just wanna kiss you
But I can't right now so baby kiss me thru the phone,
I'll see you later on
Kiss me thru the phone,
see you when I get home

Baby I know that you like me,
you my future wifey
Soulja Boy Tell 'Em, yeah
You can be my Bonnie,
I can be your Clyde
You could be my wife, text me, call me
I need you in my life, yeah all day everyday I need ya
And every time I see ya my feelings get deeper
I miss ya, I miss ya, I really wanna kiss you but I can't
Six, seven, eight, triple nine, eight, two, one, two

Baby you know that I miss you, I wanna get with you tonight
But I cannot baby girl and that's the issue
Girl you know I miss you,
I just wanna kiss you
But I can't right now so baby kiss me thru the phone,
I'll see you later on
Kiss me thru the phone,
see you when I get home

Baby I been thinking lately so much about you
Everything about you, I like it, I love it
Kissing you in public, thinking nothing of it
Roses by the dozen, talking on the phone
Baby you so sexy, your voice is so lovely
I love your complexion, I miss ya, I miss ya, I miss ya
I really wanna kiss you but I can't
Six, seven, eight, triple nine, eight, two, one, two

Baby you know that I miss you, I wanna get with you tonight
But I cannot baby girl and that's the issue
Girl you know I miss you, I just wanna kiss you
But I can't right now so baby kiss me thru the phone,
I'll see you later on
Kiss me thru the phone,
see you when I get home

She call my phone like
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
We on the phone like
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
We taking pics like
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
She dial my number like
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
Six, seven, eight, triple, nine, eight, two, one, two

Baby you know that I miss you,
I wanna get with you tonight
But I cannot baby girl and that's the issue
Girl you know I miss you, I just wanna kiss you
But I can't right now so baby kiss me thru the phone,
I'll see you later on
Kiss me thru the phone,
see you when I get home

心跳

2009-05-31T02:59:00.002+08:00

想跟我吵架
我没那麽无聊
不懂得道歉
我没那麽聪明
好想要回到我们的原点

你又在哭泣
我给不了安慰
我又在摇头
有那麽点後悔
爱情的发展已难以回头却无法往前走

但身不由己出现在胸口
两颗心能塞几个问号
爱让我们流多少眼泪

你的眼神充满美丽带走我的心跳
你的温柔如此靠近带走我的心跳
逆转时光到一开始
能不能给一秒
等着哪一天你也想起那悬在记忆中的美好

Hm.. This song is nice. I guess it just brings back memories? I dunno if there will ever be a time again when we both thought of each other at the same time, but yeah. I hope at least i made you smile before.

So it's the end of first week in my new camp. Hm.. kinda slack i would say.. Basically it's just eat, sleep and doing PT. It seems like honeymoon right now but i know what's looming ahead is gonna be damn tough. At least i'll have my 1 month stayout bike course coming up. That means i'll be sleeping on my own bed everyday! wahaha.. Oh well, that also means transport expenditure is gonna rise. rarh!

Caught Terminator Salvation today with a bunch of guys at PS, was overall an ok show i would say? The ending was disappointing so it's not worth a weekend price ticket definitely. Yeah. Then it was food fair with my family, can't missed it everytime. I just love going food fairs! Ate and drank till i was damn full, and my dinner was basically food from everywhere.

The thought of going back camp today sucks. Sigh. Why does my weekends pass so fast?! And damn i feel like going to club and drink. Need some way to release all my bottled-up frustrations and lousy mood. Alright i'm off to sleep. Nite.

same old shit again.

2009-05-24T19:54:00.002+08:00

Argh! I can't believe it's the end of block leave today! And it's back to hell tomorrow. Sigh.. oh wells, i just pray and hope that my company will treat me nicely. =D

So yeah, i'll try to enjoy my last day of civilian life. This entire week really feels like i'm in HEAVEN lar.. LOL! But everything has to end somehow yeah. So i just had a great dinner, homemade by my mum. And i'm gonna go get myself a cup of BEN & JERRYS! Yes i have 2 whole tubs waiting for me. So if you want some, come my house! haha. Then it's gonna be packing of stuff to bring into camp tml then to lalaland.

It's gonna be the start of another phase. Not sure where is the end, but i hope i'll pull through this one. Again.

nostalgia

2009-05-20T17:34:00.003+08:00

Well, just came back from watch the VJ basketball team clinched 3rd place for both guys and girls. Congrats! Stepping into the courts just bring back the feeling of playing on it for the past 3 years. Haha. Just miss running up and down on the courts and shooting hoops. In short, i miss playing basketball. Competitive basketball. Hearing all the cheers by the supporters and singing the school anthem definitely evoke past memories that i've had. Yes i'm emo-ing but i don't care. LOL!

Block leave makes me feel like something is missing from my life. Too used to the regimental lifestyle of the army i guess? Now that i've officially completed my BSLC, i'm getting closer to being a sergeant! haha. But i'm gonna become a bloody recce spec. And hearsay that the journey is freaking tough. At least i get to learn how to ride a bike or jeep? And it's a 4 week stayout course! SHIOK! Let's see how it goes. Oh yeah, the 30km route march sucks to the max!

And yes, i've just summited my online acceptance for SMU's information systems. I realised computer engineering ain't something that i wanted. So for now, smu will be my choice. Maybe i'll apply for something else next year, maybe not. Then again, all the fears that i have in diving into the course are haunting me non-stop. I know it's not going to be easy, I just hope i don't drown in it? And certainly stepping out of my comfort zone once again is tough i would say. So wish me luck!

And life isn't that bad when you look at it from another point of view. So cheer up yeah bro! night of the museum 2 on fri! woots! =D

last week of BSLC

2009-05-10T16:02:00.003+08:00

HOHOHO! it's the last week of me BSLC. That's the good thing. The bad thing is, i'm most probably going to become a recce spec after that. Now i must pray that i cross over to ocs. COME ON TAKE ME! haha. But i'll just leave it to fate lar. If that's what arranged for me then so be it. At least i'll get to learn how to ride a motorbike! And 4 weeks stayout! shiok.

I've just cleared my SOC last fri. Great sense of achievement! Only 16 out of 55 cleared it in my platoon? haha. Hm.. and i had my chemical defence shit last week as well. We were exposed to tear gas and forced to say our nric, rank and name. And after that, i cried for a good 5 mins at least. The worst thing is you can't wipe off ur tears with ur contaminated suit. Thinking back, i'll never get to experience such things in my life if not for the army. Gonna move on to my next phase of NS life soon.

Went to Kbox and drink last fri.. I didn't know we can turn the kbox room into our own club. LOL! We were damn high, probably coz of the choice of songs we were singing and dancing to. We should do it again! haha. At that moment, at least we forget all the problems we had in our lives and enjoy that second of escape.

My university choice hasn't been decided yet. And I'm running out of time. I really want to have a hostel life in uni, so i guess SMU's option should be out already. Between NTU and NUS, i dunno which is better. oh well.. Shall have a better idea after next week's tea session.

I wanna watch wolverine, friday the 13th! But apparently so many ppl have watched it already that there's no one left to watch with me. LOL! So i'll just settle for the online version when i find it. It's always the case. Next time i'll resort to going to the movies alone if i have no choice. haha. Some emo-kid.. OH there's the upcoming transformers as well! *hint hint*

I've been talking to loads of people lately. About wat? alot of things. haha. But yeah, just trying to catch up with lots of friends now that i have the time. Need to take a break, need to sort out my thoughts in life.

You're Not Sorry
Taylor Swift
All this time I was wasting,
Hoping you would come around
I've been giving out chances every time
And all you do is let me down
And it's taking me this long
Baby but I figured you out
And you're thinking we'll be fine again,
But not this time around

You don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no ohhh

Looking so innocent,
I might believe you if I didn't know
Could've loved you all my life
If you hadn't left me waiting in the cold
And you got your share of secrets
And I'm tired of being last to know
And now you're asking me to listen
Cause it's worked each time before

But you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no, ohhh
You're not sorry, no no ohhh

You had me falling for you honey
And it never would've gone away, no
You used to shine so bright
But I watched all of it fade

So you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
There's nothing left to beg for
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no ohhh
You're not sorry, no no ohhh

Deja Vu

2009-05-03T01:37:00.002+08:00

Woah.. They say lightning will not strike the same place twice, but today i experience the exact same situation as yesterday. I didn't know what happened but i saw the exact same thing happen again. Luckily everything was under control, as far as i know. So yeah, i'm really afraid. I'm afraid to lose a friend, esp a close one. All the emo monsters should be eliminated so people do not have to suffer from such a horrible disease. I wonder why so many precautions are taken to counter the swine flu, yet none is in placed to fight emo-ness. LOL! oh well..

I'm in love with Kboxing! I wanna sing sing SING! Just feel like singing my hearts out. So next time can jio me out to kbox! I missed the party-ing life. I'm gonna get it back. And i realised i'm a retard who doesn't sleep when i can, and then sleep during times that i'm supposed to stay awake. Just like how i'm spending the time blogging now instead of sleeping.

And yes, i finally bought 2 tubs of ben & jerrys for myself. 22.85 bucks. Promotion at NTUC. Go get it! Gonna open them tml! =D

A few more songs and i'm off to sleep. It's a cold and windy night.

You chose to walk out of my sight, but at that very moment, you not only walked out of my sight.

untitled

2009-05-01T02:29:00.003+08:00

Quote of the day, "It is impossible to be completely close to someone whom you have been emotionally distant."

Hm.. For some reasons, alot has been running through my mind the past few days. And for some reasons, maybe i've been avoiding things for too long, pretending that nothing has happened but in fact so much has happened. Oh well, I'll handle things rationally i hope.

It's 2 more weeks to the end of BSLC! and hopefully i get into a good vocation. Regarding whether i would cross over to OCS, i shall just leave it to fate. haha. Kinda half-hearted but if that's my calling, then i guess i'll go? I can't wait to get out of army! rarh! 1 year 5 months more!

And i'm still in a dilemma as to which uni i should go to! All 3 unis offered me a place, which is a good thing. Having a choice is a good thing, yet it is a bad thing when u have to make the choice. I really want to go smu but i'm not confidant at all in taking up the course. Don't wanna just go then can't cope with the course. Even if smu is not in the pic, i can't decide nus or ntu would be better. THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING! RARH!

I wanna shout out loud! Anyone wanna hit the beach with me?!

black and white.

2009-04-26T00:55:00.002+08:00

Everyday's being a routine now. Sigh. I guess i need to spice up my life a little. Need to find something to do or something interesting to entertain myself. Not even surfing the net is fun now. rarh.

I miss the times of the past. What exactly do i miss i'm not sure, perhaps i just miss everything? haha. This is what they meant by life sucks huh? haha. How come everyone's having such a happening life while i'm stuck here..

OH well, enough of the emo shit. I feel like getting myself a Wii! haha. But on second thoughts, i wun actually have much time to play with it, so i'm gonna drop the idea. Then again, i wan to play guitar hero! Damn. This is tough. And i wan a new phone! My current one is dying, fast. Sigh, so many wants on my list, but non seem practical. LOL! And i've received news for my uni applications. Now i'm in a dilemma as well. At least i've a month of so to think bout it. I'm in love with the song below! Although it's kinda old, but it's damn nice. =D

乌云在我们心里刻下一块阴影
我聆听沉寂已久的心情
清晰透明就像美丽的风景
总在回忆里才看的清
被伤透的心能不能够继续爱我
我用力牵起没温度的双手
过往温柔已经被时间上锁
只剩挥散不去的难过

缓缓掉落的枫叶像思念
我点燃烛火温暖岁末的秋天
极光掠过天边
北风掠过想你的容颜
我把爱烧成了落叶
却换不回熟悉的那张脸
缓缓掉落的枫叶像思念
为何挽回要赶在冬天来之前
爱你穿越时间
两行来自秋末的眼泪
让爱渗透了地面
我要的只是你在我身边

被伤透的心能不能够继续爱我
我用力牵起没温度的双手
过往温柔已经被时间上锁
只剩挥散不去的难过

在山腰间飘逸的红雨
随著北风凋零
我轻轻摇曳风铃
想唤醒被遗弃的爱情
雪花已铺满了地
深怕窗外枫叶已结成冰

update.

2009-04-11T01:52:00.002+08:00

I'm kinda lazy to update my blog recently. Haha. Rather just go online and do other stuff. Oh well, 3 weeks has passed since i entered SISPEC. Just hope that time will pass faster and i get posted to a nice unit!

My life hasn't been quite colourful lately, in fact i think it's kinda boring? well, i've kinda settled my uni application stuff so just waiting for them to tell me i'm accepted hopefully! And smu interview was quite alright so yeah.. I liked smu to be honest, but i'm worried about the course that i'm signing up and their grading style. Oh well, see how it goes..

And my birthday was great! Celebrated 2 days in advanced with my gf coz my actual birthday fell on a weekday, meaning i'll be in camp. Didn't receive as many presents this year but i'm just glad people remember my birthday! haha.

ohoh! i got myself an ipod touch! That burnt a hole in my pocket yes! but i thought that i should pamper myself a little bit huh.. lols. And now i want to get a Wii so that i can play guitar heroes! Gonna save up for it! anyone is welcome to chip in! =D

Alright, this took me 5 minutes of precious sleeping time. So i guess i'm off to sleep! gd nite folks!

POP loh!

2009-03-12T02:04:00.002+08:00

Finally! The long awaited day has arrived. It's the day when i passed out of my BMT. It feels great to graduate from BMT! No longer need to take that stupid ferry to tekong! wahaha. 9 weeks has passed since i was enlisted. I would say these 9 weeks have been quite fulfilling and definitely they are filled with memories i would not forget anytime soon. Guess it wasn't that bad afterall.

Now that i've a 10 day or so break, suddenly it seemed that i've alot of time on hand. Just trying to fill up all my available timeslots so that i would not waste any particular day. There are so many things i wanted to do, but i dun wanna do it alone. sigh. I hate waiting for answers.

Haven't seen you for days, weeks, months? I lost count.

Surf N Sweat!

2009-03-01T15:46:00.002+08:00

woah.. Today's biathlon was quite fun. But the paddling took the hell out of me. And i'm kinda sunburned now. But that's not wat's bothering me. As i was running, random thoughts just flashed through my mind. And the thought of going back army was equally bad. haha. My sense of accomplishment today was that i managed to push my friend to run finish. =) guess i'll do it again next year?

i hope this week passes fast, of coz if results are coming out then hope results are good as well. Just taking things in stride. Ironically, i hope time would slow down, then i would be able to savour every moment of happiness even if it's short-lived. 15 mins more and i'll be on my way back to the sunny island of tekong. =(

Everyone's that struggling out there, be it due to studies, work, life, family or whatsoever, don't give up yeah? Just a little encouragement from me, may not have any effect on you, but still, jiayou!

I wanna hold your hand.. You were so close, yet so far.. Just don't disappear from my sight.

Let me be myself.

2009-02-28T11:22:00.007+08:00

Let Me Be Myself

I guess i just got lost being someone else,
I tried to kill the pain
But nothing ever helped
I left myself behind
Somewhere along the way
Hoping to come back around
and find myself some day

Lately I'm so tired of waiting for you
To say that it's OK, tell me please
Would you one time,
Let Me Be Myself
So i can shine,
with my own light
Let Me Be Myself

Would you Let Me Be Myself
Coz I'll never find my heart
Behind someone else
I'll never see the light of day
Living in this cell
It's time to make my way
Into the world i knew
And take back all of these times
That I gave in to you

Lately I'm so tired of waiting for you
To say that it's OK, tell me please
Would you one time,
Let Me Be Myself
So i can shine,
with my own light
Let Me Be Myself,
For a while
If you don't mind,
Let Me Be Myself
So i can shine,
with my own light
Let Me Be Myself

That's all i ever wanted from this world
Was to let me be me..

Please, would you one time,
Let Me Be Myself
So i can shine,
with my own light
Let Me Be Myself
Please, would you one time,
Let Me Be Myself
So i can shine,
with my own light
Let Me Be Myself,
For a while
If you don't mind,
Let Me Be Myself
So i can shine,
with my own light
Let Me Be Myself

It's just another week more to go to POP! but the bad thing is, A' levels results are coming out this friday. Sigh. Wonder how sucky my results are gonna be. =( don't dare to get back results man. this sucks.

And yesterday's 16km route march is hell. I got blisters all over my feet now. Walking in boots is damn f-ing pain can. Plus we were marching in the rain. Drenched, tired and hungry. And i suppose i was having a slight fever on top of my cough and flu. My buddy was running a temperature of 39 and i had to support him throughout which made it even more tiring for me. But i guess i'm glad i managed to pull him through. Somehow, i just felt that my platoon was so bonded then. Can't imagine how i'm gonna survive 24km.

I guess this few days really made a difference to my life. Perhaps coz there was too much time in camp that i was thinking alot. Damn. Emo shit again. Reminds me of some emo-momo brother! haha. But yeah, just that i wasn't feeling too good. Plus I have no avenues to vent my frustrations on. sigh. I feel like screaming! ARGH!

2009-02-22T16:41:00.002+08:00

My Life Would Suck Without You lyrics

Guess this means you're sorry
You're standing at my door
Guess this means you take back
All you said before
Like how much you wanted
Anyone but me
Said you'd never come back
But here you are again

(Chorus)
Cuz we belong together now, yea
Forever united here somehow, yea
You got a piece of me
And honestly
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

Maybe I was stupid
For telling you goodbye
Maybe I was wrong
For tryin' to pick a fight
I know that I've got issues
But you're pretty messed up too
Either way I found out I'm nothing without you

(Chorus)

Being with you is so dysfunctional
I really shouldn't miss you,
But I can't let you go,
Oh yeah

{ music break}

Cuz we belong together now, yea yea
Forever united here somehow, yea
You got a piece of me
And honestly
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

Cuz we belong (yeah) together now (together now), (yeah)
Forever united here somehow, yea
You got a piece of mi
And honestly
My life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you

Quite an interesting song huh? haha. Just another silent moment on my own.. 3 hours before going back to the stupid island of tekong. And it would be another 5 days before i come out again. Sigh. Feeling kinda moody now i guess. Bare with the whining yeah. It's another 2 and a half weeks to POP! Not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing. I like my section mates, and i'll miss them when we got post out of BMT. Whatever it is, life still has to move on..

This weekend has been quite terrible for me, partly due to my irritating cough and flu definitely. Then again, it might be just because i'm tired. Not getting ample rest even on my weekends. This is not good. But to me, sleeping is a waste of time coz i could have spend it doing something more meaningful. Oh well.. I should sleep more i conclude. Oh i really wanted to watch the movie 'slumdog millionaire' but there's no one to watch with. Alright, off to pack my bag.

Sometimes i look in the mirror.. And i can't help laughing..

just 3 weeks more.

2009-02-17T16:56:00.002+08:00

3 weeks more to POP! woo! So fast 5 plus 6 weeks have past. Can't believe it. And it has been really tiring and mentally draining for the past few weeks due to outfield activities. But definitely, i did have my fair share of fun with my friends.

I certainly miss civilian life man.. And yes, i miss having hair, just black hair will do. haha. Can't wait to grow hair again. Have to wait quite some time i guess. =( Missed my valentine's day due to some test so yeah i spent my vday in camp with all guys. It's been some time since i spend vday with guys. ARGH! Oh well, nothing great about it, i'll celebrate it next time with her! *promise*

Actually i had alot of things to blog, but somehow after i log in, i lost all my thoughts. Well, i wonder how life will start to change when we get back our A' level results. I honestly don't wanna get it back, coz i'm pretty sure i screw it up. Sigh. So what's gonna be my next step in life? don't dare to think about it.

I really hoped to share more of your burden. Seeing you so stressed up makes me unable to rest in peace as well. No matter what, i'll always give you my utmost support. jiayou!

So the time has finally come.

2009-01-07T19:30:00.002+08:00

It's finally here. The time to say good bye to the sunny main island and off to tekong in less than 13 hours. I'm pretty sure last time i wasn't afraid of the arrival of this day, but now i wouldn't say the same thing. Haha. It just seems so scary all of a sudden. Went down to beach road today to get some stuff in preparation for tomorrow. Felt so lost there when i was buying those stuff. Argh! I really hate this feeling of abandoning my current life and go serve ns. No hair, no sleeping on my bed, no games, no GIRLS! I'm so going to miss my gf, i swear. Not sure if my relationship would turn out after i go ns, but i guess i'll just let nature take its course yeah?

Waiting for my dinner, one last dinner at home before i go army. Haven't had a taste of my mum's cooking since 2 weeks ago i think. So going to miss it as well. Rejected all my dinner dates just to spend the evening at home. Made use of my past few days catching up with different groups of people, dind't leave out alot i guess. Shit, i'm emo-ing wth.. Alright, i shall go play some games before dinner. Not gonna come online anywhere soon so don't expect updates. CYA SOON! =D

Sayonara 2008.

2008-12-31T15:53:00.004+08:00

Hm.. Well, since everyone is writing a post to conclude their 2008, i shall do one also.

Studies wise, this year has definitely been much better compared to when i was in J1. Partly coz it's the A's and everyone mugs for it. Did put in loads of effort and now i can only pray that everything went well. haha. And not forgetting everyone who has encouraged me in one way or another, and all my study mates. Thanks for helping me through this period.

Basketball this year has been pretty eventful as well. Didn't expect to get 3rd for inter-schools. Top 4 was good enough and anything more would be a bonus. I would say we could have made it to the finals actually. But well, things doesn't always go our way. So i just thank god that the team strived hard and got something we deserved. Being the vice-captain certainly wasn't an easy task. The need to perform on and off the court has taken a toll on me greatly and i'm just glad everything is over. 4 years in vj, 4 years of intense training. Yeah, it's time to put a closure to it. As for clubwise, it's kinda dumb playing for killiney kopitiam. Went there to take shoes and jersey only.. haha. But this year we made it to the 2nd round, surprisingly. Nothing to be proud of coz i didn't play much. Then for constituency, as expected, we lost 2 games in a row and said sayonara. But as a captain, i did push the team to the max already and defintely, we were better than last year. Next year hopefully will be better. Thanks for all the support my teammates have given me. All these wouldn't have been possible without you guys.

To my class gang, you guys have been a great bunch of guys to hang out with. All the crazy moments that we shared in school, be it throwing curry puffs at each other, doing nonsensical things in school, going up the stage to be clowns, i just wanna say it's awesome! I admit that this class ain't exactly bonded, but knowing that there's always you guys around certainly make me miss 07s51 alot now that we dun get to hang out in class anymore.

To my sec2 class people, you guys are people that i wun forget for life. Esp my baller teammates. I still dun believe we didn't get to nationals. haha. Well, didn't expect that we would still be able to keep in touch after i left for IP in sec 3. All the little things that we've done together in sec 1 and 2 simply brought smiles to my face whenever i think of it. Just glad that i'll always have you guys in my life.

Then last but not least, my pri sch people! wahaha. Well, things aren't exactly very smooth in planning every gathering, but defintely it was worth all the arrangement. Now that all of us have turned 18, we should be doing what 18 and above people do. LOL! Up to you guys to think what it is. Looking forward to the CNY gathering. I want more red packets! =D

Relationship hasn't been all smooth-sailing. Shan't comment much on it. haha. Haven't figure out what i was thinking anyways. Yeah.

FINALLY! I'm done addressing the major groups of people i think? So now i'm all ready to leave for msia. After i come back, the number of days left before i go army are countable with 1 hand. haha. Now i need 2 hands to do the counting but that's sad enough. All along i thought i was prepared and ready to go in, but all of a sudden it seems so scary. oh well, it's something all guys have to go through afterall.

So yeah, let's say bye bye to 2008 and hello to 2009! Hope 2009 would be a better year as everyone says, and may the recession be over soon, may there be good A level results, and may my army life not be so tough. LOL! Alright, i'm still thinking what should my new year resolution be. Will put it up when i think of it, till then, enjoy the last day of 2008! Happy New Year! =D

*edited*
I forget to thank 2 important people! And they are my gf's godsisters. I guess life wouldn't be that colourful afterall without them. Really glad that i came to know them and the times that we all had together were certainly worth remembering. haha. Hope you 2 see this! And definitely i won't forget you 2 after i go army. =D

Christmas?

2008-12-27T20:20:00.002+08:00

What a christmas eve and christmas.. This is the worst christmas, and i am gonna emphasize the word WORST, of all my 18 years living on this stupid planet. Well, firstly i did have plans on those days but it was thoroughly ruined. And i can't believe i still forgive someone for it. Maybe coz it's christmas.. I dunno what i'm thinking anyway. Oh then, i received no present this year! ZERO! WTH! this i have nothing to say. Sigh.. I gave out so many presents, but none came back. Oh well, to hell with the saying, 'xmas is about giving'. Next year i'll give my foot! RARH! pissed.

OH yeah, had my pri sch mates outing yesterday. It's always some outing worth looking forward to. Maybe coz the company was really good. We had dinner at the manhattan fish market, then went to drink somewhere, then rot our asses off while waiting for movie. Guess wat time the movie was? 2.30am! And we were watching transporters 3. OMG I seriously tried my best to stay awake. But half an hour into the movie, i KO-ed. The next thing i know, it ended. That's how wisely i spent 8 bucks. Damn. To think we're in a recession lately.

Hm.. Looking forward to going genting/KL on the 31st night, this meant i'll most probably be counting down at the immigration checkpoint. Nvm lar. Rather than squeeze with people in town. Alright, i'm off to play my GTA. Haven touched it for a few days? haha. Will update again before i go army. 8th Jan. Sigh. cya folks!

it's so monotonous..

2008-12-14T14:48:00.002+08:00

Life's so boring nowadays after i came back from hongkong. Feeling kinda lazy to upload my photos. haha. So until the day comes where i have the mood, there wun be any photos here i guess? too bad! =p

It's just another 3 weeks more to NS enlistment but i'm not really spending my time wisely. Doing the same things over and over again everyday. Post A's doesn't seemed as fantastic as i thought i would be. Oh well, better than mugging my life away. Argh.. Just feel like ranting.. haha.

Friends are there when you need them, how true is this? Lately i'm just thinking, how many of my friends there are really people whom you can really label them as 'friends'? Somehow, i just feel so different from the rest of them at times. oh well, life still has to go on.

Gonna go off for a date. secret rendezvous. lalala. till then, cya folks! =D

a few hours more..

2008-12-05T21:03:00.002+08:00

Time seemed to pass real fast.. A few hours more and i'll be on my way to hongkong! So excited man! Something i've been looking forward to since my prelims? Before i knew it, i'm so close to it already. And once again, i'm going to the airport not to send someone off but to go overeas myself! haha. I guess it's abit too late for anyone to tell me if they wan me to get something for them. This way i can spend more on myself! =D

I hate the fact that we humans are so emotional. Some people to be abit more extreme, while people like me, i guess i seemed to be able to hide alot more? But sometimes while i try to comfort others or to cheer others up, i'm also hurting inside. Oh well, thank god that i've a bloody high tolerance level. It is good in a way, bad in another. Perhaps to people around me, i just hope to be ur listening ear when you need someone. Cheer up man! Dajie said this:"Life is short, so live your life and smile more!"

finally i see colours!

2008-11-30T00:15:00.002+08:00

i just dyed and highlighted my hair! haha like finally i can have hair colour that is not that black. Bloody hell so many years of education deprived me of the right to dye it like this. damn. finally i'm free! wahaha.

Hm.. going for night cycling tml then basketball farewell on mon. Prom on tues. Haven't had any plans for the next 3 days. And off i go to hongkong on sat! woo! Can't wait. Time is so going to pass damn quickly this week.

Ain't in a mood to blog nowadays. Somehow i lost the passion i had before A levels. LOL! oh well. Nothing much to report also. Life isn't as beautiful as i made it out to be before A levels. haha. But at least now i dun have to worry about exams. =D

hm.. I've been wondering..

WOOHOO!!

2008-11-22T17:55:00.002+08:00

I'm back! And my laptop is back as well! Wahaha! Can start blogging and using the com like last time. Finally everything is over! Just waiting for this moment! haha. Have been really enjoying my life for the past few days. Just play and play and play! No stress, no study, no work. Totally awesome!

I've started on my fitness training programme once again. haha. Just a short run and swim yesterday made me feel so tired today. Adding on, i only did 300 crunches and my stomach was aching today. ARGH! feel so weak. whatever.

3on3 today was crap. Ended up 2nd when we were suppose to get 1st deal to some stupid coin tossing. retarded. 50 dollar sportslink voucher got no shit use to me. and my friend beside me won a mobile phone in lucky draw. WTH! imba unlucky day. Feeling damn pmsy today for some reason, ignore me.

My next week is full of activities. Almost all packed. Just trying to make the best of my last month or so before i go NS. yeah. For now, i shall go watch my show. cya!

A LEVELS!

2008-11-04T20:26:00.002+08:00

OMG! it's right in the midst of my A' levels period. So damn stressed. And tired. Physics paper 3 and maths paper 1 down today. phew.. quite a load lightened i would say. Gp yesterday was bad. Having a one day break before my first chem paper. Press on. JIAyou!

I'm sick of studying..

2008-10-19T18:29:00.002+08:00

若是我有一百万一百万
我有一百万一世人没有遗憾
有钱才有爱买花要慷慨
百天送Tiffany 生日要给LV
说也不苦命只是打拼的打工仔
薪水不够生儿育女只够HDB
若是我有一百万我要坐飞机
每天驾Ferarri Hawaii洒太阳 Japan吃Sushi
若是我有一百万要炒金炒股票
天天数钞票天天跷大脚天天哈哈笑
If we all have 一百万一百万
要是你的手头紧开口别客气

有钱才有爱买花要慷慨
百天送Tiffany 生日要给LV
说也不苦命只是打拼的打工仔
薪水不够唱KTV 只够HDB
若是我有一百万我要坐飞机每天驾Ferarri
去威尼斯划船罗马吃Spaghetti
若是我有一百万我指的是英镑不是讲Rupiah
闲着没事干陪美女做 Yoga

若是我有一百万我要坐飞机
每天驾Ferarri Hawaii洒太阳 Japan吃Sushi
若是我有一百万要炒金炒股票
天天数钞票天天跷大脚天天哈哈笑
If we all have 一百万一百万
要是你的手头紧开口别客气
若是我有一百万分给你
反正只是梦而已当然吗没问题
若是我有一百万一百万

Finally got my hands on this song. Haha. just couldn't help listening to it over and over again. Maybe i really think too much of having a million bucks. LOL! OH well, at least this is stress relieving. =)

It's just 2 weeks away. Sigh. I'm really in deep deep shit. I really tried and put in my best everyday. i swear. Just need to work harder.

my longest run.

2008-10-10T01:32:00.002+08:00

Went for a run today with my brother again. Was feeling so bored doing work. Then just before running he tell me we running like 10km or so. I was like wth coz the furthest i ran before was like 9km i think? But heck lar. And the run begins.. Run all the way to punggol park, past punggol primary, past eunice's house, past the old ntuc i used to frequent, past my old house, past hougang green, past sengkang cc, and home. FINALLY. Can't believe i actually ran so far. Hm.. suddenly i feel like taking part in the half-marathon next year. OH YA! I almost got knocked down by a car while running wtf. Some bloody mazda or what, tried to show off its engine and almost killed me while i was running across a zebra crossing. God bless i'm still alive.

Oh well, it's like 3 more weeks only. So freaking near and i'm nowhere near prepared. Running out of time. Jiayou! =D

the 2nd csc match.

2008-10-09T01:41:00.002+08:00

My CSC competition ended today officially. It was quite a big loss if i didn't renember correctly. 97-58? haha. Was really out there sweating it out and having fun. Losing didn't matter to us today. And i really wanna thank the coach for being so nice to us. He was the reason i chose to play this year. Too bad we couldn't win a single match again this year. But i guess next year will be better!

Really putting in loads of effort into my studies recently. Remedials everyday in school, one followed by the other. Struggling to keep up man.. But at least i'm doing. And i'm spending less time online now. No more playing. No time.. Got so many papers waiting for me. I really hope i can pull through this. sigh. Sometimes i really feel like i'm alone in this. =(

Oh i've no time to upload pictures coz blogger is being a retard by always saying there's something wrong when i try to do it. So i gave up trying to upload the pics and just put up the posts. haha. And sorry to peijun who thought you would be able to watch the whatever puppets. It was really damn retarded though. Not good for health. So watch my video instead. =D I'll remove the title next time as it's misleading. yawn.. I guess i shall go off now. Have to wake up early tomorrow and the cycle repeats. cya!

Open house.

2008-10-04T22:34:00.002+08:00

I shall make this short coz i really ain't in the mood to blog. Well, today was open house. Kinda looked forward to it as i'm gonna go back and play ball with the others and my seniors. The day started with me waking up late. And i rushed down to school. Played ball under the hot blazing run really is tiring.. But surprisingly, i don't seem tired at all. Then was off to watch dance and a couple of performances. After which came the horrifying, terrifying, disastrous scene. I was playing vball with a couple of seniors near out booth, just as i attempted a spike, my seniors missed the ball. The next thing i know, 2 trophies were on the floor. broken. shattered? Everyone in the hall just stopped and look in my direction. Oh well, u can imagine it. Although it was just a trophy, somehow it symbolises the hard work the entire team has put in throughout the whole year. Sigh.. Still kinda traumatized by it. RARH! Feeling damn f*** up. Luckily my teacher didn't really blame me for it. owe her another one. Alright i shall go and play some mahjong to destress. nite!

Graduation Day cum CLASS OUTING!

2008-10-03T23:53:00.002+08:00

WOO! Today was so called graduation day. The assembly was great with all the performances and videos. Shall cut it short. It was definitely a rare time that i felt quite sad that i'm leaving my class and this college. Once again, it's 4 years for me. Imagine the feeling of putting on your college tie for the last time, and singing the college anthem for the last time. The least i could say was i sung with gusto! =D

After the special CT session where we got all our certs and stuff, we had a CLASS OUTING OMG! Like once in a blue moon! Maybe coz I always didn't go. LOL! Oh well, it was a trip to marina square and we had lunch at Breeks. The pasta wasn't that fantastic but it was certainly quite filling. After we had our lunch, it was the usual 'fist-guessing' game. The forfeit was a teaspoon of 'x', x = a mixture of many ingredients such as chilli sauce, tobasco, pepper, ice cream etc. First 2 rounds i managed to avoid x with sheer bit of luck. But the 3rd round, against a girl at the last stage, I lost. It's unfair lar. All of the others were on her side. They just love to see me suffer i guess. rarh! With a deep breath, i put the teaspoon in. The rest was history. I gulped down 2 glasses of water at least. But the smell and taste still linger in my mouth.. It was, however, the first time i see so many of my classmates having fun together. sigh..

Oh yeah, i changed the blogskin. Coz someone made me realise the picture of my old one has been removed. LOL! Don't really like this one though. But it was something that's different so i just took it. whatever. Until i have time to find another one, please bear with this. =)

This is a glimpse of 'x'. You won't understand how i felt until you ate it for yourself.

INSERT PIC

Ohoh! I walked past this arcade machine and saw lots of mini elmos, cookie monsters and big birds in it. They were so cute. Not that i'm particularly into semame street but they were cute. haha.

INSERT PIC

sportman's night.

2008-10-03T01:30:00.002+08:00

Oh well, today was the first ever Sportsman's Night in vj. It was just a dinner for us sports people that represent the college. Nothing much spectacular but it did provide a good opportunity for all the teams to just gather and have a meal together. Haven't seen all my teammates together for some time since A divs had ended. Reminds me of the days that we would see each other almost everyday due to trainings. Haha. Hated those days but yet i miss them now. How ironic.. Tomorrow is finally graduation day for J2s. That would close another chapter in my life i guess? Last day of official school. 4 years just zoomed past. Haven't really stop in my tracks and take a good look around the school. Time waits for no man. Well said. Ain't really close to my class people so it doesn't really affect me much. Just that i can't bear to leave this school after all the fond memories it gave me. =) Sigh. I'll contribute back to the school next time when i grow up. haha. Someone must remind me in case i forget. lalala.. It's really damn damn damn damn fast. Year by year, i can't wait for the next year to come. Looking back, I didn't seem to have make full use of my time in college and now i'm starting to regret. From now on it'll be lots and lots of mugging and studying. Hopefully i'll be able to move on to my next chapter in life without worrying that i've bad grades. haha. cya people! Graduation day = emo day! =D

random.

2008-09-30T01:56:00.002+08:00

This shall be a random 5-min blogpost before i go off to sleep. It's like almost 2am right now. Can't seem to kick the nocturnal habit. But well, at least i managed to get my maths paper done just now. Really hope to do well for A's.

Oh yeah, went running again just now. But this time, i had a double stitch while running and i almost died on the way back. haha. Exaggerated but really very xin ku ah! It was left stitch at first, then somehow it moved to the right. AND THEN, both sides stitch. just my luck today. But running makes me feel better and in a better state of mind to study. =)

My family might be planning to go overseas in dec! Like wow! But my mum tell me to pay for part of the costs. hm.. Don't really mind paying as long as there's plenty of shopping to be done. haha. I'm a extreme shopaholic if you do not know. My shopping stamina has so far been unrivalled as far as i know. lols. Come challenge me!

just as i was listening to the famous jason mraz 'i'm yours', somehow it triggered an impulse in me. oh well, shan't think so much. I'm gonna go off to sleep! lalala. gd nite!

emo-ing..

2008-09-27T02:49:00.002+08:00

Don't really feel like going to sleep so i decide to come and blog. Listening to a couple of emo songs right now.. Words can't expressed my emotions i guess? Oh well..

Went to play ball with my 'sisters' just now. would it be weird if i put jies? lolx. yeah you know what i mean. Haven't ball for quite some time and i'm kinda rusty. Was inside the paint for most of the time coz i'm a guy. But the opponents are all much bigger and taller. Although i'm much FITTER and STRONGER. hm.. LOL! but yeah. Had a couple of knocks here and there but i'm still alive and kicking. =p Felt much better with their company, maybe with all the lameness and jokes. haha.

Hm.. I failed econs again. yes again. damn it. I really tried my best leh. sigh. Really hopeless in this topic. Since wed, i've been trying to get my hands on loads of question papers for maths and physics. Haven't got any for chem yet. I'm gonna practise and practise and do hell lot of papers. Just gonna play out my last weekend and then get down to serious work. I just can't stand losing out to ppl actually.

My end year overseas trips are getting nowhere. lolx. So irritating. Cost factor not really a prob but it is still a problem when it gets too high huh. haha. I might end up rotting in singapore while my other friends go overseas. Maybe i shall make a trip to pulau ubin since i haven't been there for some time. LOL! Self-delusion. lalala.. At least it'll keep me occupied.

ARGH! I can't get studies off my mind. sigh.. Suddenly my little world seemed to buckle under the immense stress load. It proved too heavy afterall. jiayou bah! i can do it. =)

Take Your Sweet Time (Sugar Mix) - Jesse Mccartney

Take Your Sweet Time

It isnt a crime to want
A little space to breathe
But you will be fine
The sun again will shine on you
Whatever you do

[Chorus]
Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here when you change your mind
Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here for you baby
Anytime

Im feeling you pull away
'cause letting go isnt easy for me
But you'll never fly
With someone elses wings, I know
Wherever you go

[Repeat Chorus]

I will never stand in your way
Wherever your heart may lead you
I will love you the same
And I will be your comfort every day
Do you hear the words I say?

[Repeat Chorus]

Hm.. Not sure if i'd put this song up before but it's a nice song anyway. So no harm.. Yeah. I'm gonna go get some beauty sleep. Good night people! =D

results again.

2008-09-26T00:12:00.003+08:00

Went for a swim today with my friend. Not really there to swim but more of to just soak in water. haha. Coz my muscles were aching so badly that i can't walk steadily.. So i guess being in the pool for awhile might aid in recovery. Feeling much better now. But there's a new problem. There's water in my right ear somehow and i can't get it out. damn it. So irritating.

Oh yeah, got back maths today. Much to my disappointment, i did so badly. haha. Looking back at the answers make me feel so dumb. oh well. After yesterday's results, today i dun seem to take it that much to heart. Shan't comment much. But i know i'm gonna work hard. no more another chance already. still got econs tomorrow. jiayou bah! =)

Results part 1.

2008-09-25T01:28:00.003+08:00

Hm.. first day of school. terrible. Just slept my way through almost the entire day. And results SUCKS to the core. So f-ing disappointed. sigh. I thought i could do better. Maybe i ain't putting enough effort. So i'm gonna stop playing dota as much from now on.. I sumpa. Shall put more effort into studying and doing papers and practices. BUCK UP! Feeling damn lousy now. damn it.
And i've made a new resolution as well. That is to go run regularly. That motivation comes from my brother of coz. Seeing him go on night runs alone, somehow i just feel like running with him today. Maybe partly coz i haven't been running for some time, partly coz i wanna change my lifestyle. Yeah. So from now on, study more, run more, play less.

As i was running down the roads, cars whizz passed me continuously. The 7km stretch seemed never-ending. Somehow it just occured to me that i haven't run with her before. Maybe.. I'm just thinking too much.

Even if i could go back in time, i would still choose to do it again. =) jiayou!

post prelim weekend.

2008-09-23T15:40:00.006+08:00

I'm back! After a super long weekend which was really damn hectic.

Shall start with saturday. Hm.. Had my first competitive bball match since ages ago and i wasn't really looking forward to it. WHY? Because i haven't been exercising for like months! haha. It was really hell on the courts when i sprint up and down. All of a sudden, the court seemed twice its size, my legs couldn't seem to move! It's a sign. Bad one. My stamina like going down and down ever since i stopped training. Sigh. We eventually lost that match by like 20 pts? Can't exactly remember but it was a thrashing. oh well..

Mahjong at night was awesome. haha. Went on a killing spree. Totally random but yeah. Now i'm gonna weigh my spendings in terms of the 'tai'. Like 5 tai zi mo! you know? haha. Shall show you all a sample of my winning hand.

amazing hand..

Then sunday was primary school clique gathering! Although i was the organiser, but we can't decide on where to go. LOL! In the end we went to fishman's wharf and eat. Not a bad place i would say. Food was quite alright and economic. Filling too. So it's a pretty good recommendation. It's just opposite Central in clarke quay for those who are interested. I took a picture of my HALIBUT FISH. haha.

Not bad right? looks appetising.

Monday was just plain lazy so i stayed at home. At night just went to catch my friend's bball match. After that our coach fetch us to changi to eat and look at some gorgeous ladies. LOL! After which was overnight mahjong at friend's house. Make me so tired today. Cheong home in the morning and slept till 3. Now i'm here after i ate my noodles. That pretty sums up my weekend i guess?

It's back to school tomorrow. And i shall start to settle down and get back to studying. Haiz. A' levels are coming! mugmugmug! Stomachache again. To the toilet i shall go! cya! =D

lalalala elmo song!

2008-09-20T14:08:00.005+08:00

This shall be a damn random post. As there's no more prelims for me to rant about! haha. Well, yesterday signals the end of prelims. wahahah! Then i went to had lunch with my friend at pepper lunch. Went for the gaming convention and i so wanted that stupid panda balloon but they want me to queue for it. damn it. Make me go off without the panda balloon. It was pastamania for dinner. Feeling rich today huh? I spent everything in my wallet on food. LOL! Nvm. Being able to eat is a blessing. =D Oh then i was walking past the NUM shop in citylink on my way to the MRT. I took a picture of this elmo and cookie monster which were kinda cute. lalala elmo song!

There is this reflection of a map on the window glass. Not my fault. =p

OH and i just got a new pair of shoes yesterday. Adding to my 6 pairs of shoes on top of my shoes cabinet. wahahaa! The best thing about it, it's free!

i know you're jealous. lalala..

Then i've been eyeing the following pair of soccer boots for damn long. DAMN long! But it's not practical for me so i decided not to get it. But really in loved with it. I feel like collecting shoes next time. haha. random.

F50.8 tunit.

I shall end this post here. And i realy need to use the toilet now! cya!

prelims are over SOON.

2008-09-18T23:11:00.002+08:00

HELLO!! WOO!! I'm exactly 12 hours away from the ends of prelims! Haha.. Just can't wait for it to be over. Going school for just an hour and 15 mins of mcq. And it's physics. ARGH! Nvm. The wait won't be long. I'm already planning my post prelims celebrations! LOL!

I'm wondering how life will be like when i grow up.. Hm.. Just thinking.. =)

It's amazing

2008-09-17T19:59:00.002+08:00

Its Amazing - JEM

It's Amazing

Do it now
You know who you are
You feel it in your heart
And you're burning and wishing

At first, wait, won't get it on a plate
You're gonna have to work for it harder and harder
And I knew 'cause I've been there before
Knocking on the doors with rejection (rejection)
And you'll see 'cause if it's meant to be
Nothing can compare to deserving your dreams

It's amazing, it's amazing
all that you can do
It's amazing, makes my heart sing
Now it's up to you

Patience now, frustration's in the air
And people who don't care
Well it's gonna get you down
And you'll (you'll) fall (fall)
Yes you will hit a wall
But get back on your feet
And you'll be stronger and smarter

And I knew 'cause I've been there before
Knocking down the doors won't take "No" for an answer
And you'll see 'cause if it's meant to be
Nothing can compare to deserving your dreams

It's amazing, it's amazing
all that you can do
It's amazing, makes my heart sing
Now it's up to you

Ooo-ooo-ooo
[ electric voice ]

It's amazing, it's amazing
all that you can do
It's amazing, makes my heart sing
Now it's up to you

It's amazing, it's amazing
all that you can do
It's amazing, makes my heart sing
Now it's up to you
Ahh-ahh-ahh

What an amazing song.. LOL! It didn't seem that nice to some people but somehow i just love it. Have been on repeat on my media player for a few hours? haha. i was kinda lazy to change song. Hm.. There's chem MCQ paper tomorrow and i've done nothing to prepare for it. Seemed like there ain't any papers left. Shall go read up on my organic chem! Ohoh! I went to the newly opened Sengkang swimming complex this morning. It was totally cool and concept was new. Even had an indoor pool and slides. The toilets are damn clean as well. Those are the plus points. The one and only bad thing! I kept playing repeated on the slides until after one particular slide, my butt felt DAMN hot. And after that slide, i saw a hole in my shorts. WAH! the friction was so great that it caused a hole! gosh.. But i'm gonna go there and swim more often though.. Spent these 2 days playing and playing.. Shall go do some studying.. cya! =D

it's been a month.

2008-09-15T00:01:00.002+08:00

I just got the surprise of the month. Someone gave me a box of mooncakes! Delivered to my doorstep. So i came here specially to blog this down! If i'm not wrong, it's been more than a month since i last saw her. She should know i love mooncakes, and she really got it for me! I'm speechless since 2 hours ago.

I'm totally unprepared for econs case study tomorrow. I think i did alright for my essays but i'm quite sure my case study is gonna pull the marks down. ARgh! I shall make use of the 4 hours break in between to study and do something about it. *PRAYS HARD* Now i just hope chem won't kill me first before i can even get to econs.

OH YA! I'm so in love with the new Sony Ericsson W980! Nice, Cool, Style. What else? haha.. I really wanted to change phone, and considering that i've quite alot of spare cash on hand. Don't try to rob me. Don't even think about it. Just kidding! But then, since i'm gonna go army next year, it would be quite dumb to change phone right now. This is so ironic. Lolx. Those of you thinking of getting a new phone, you could check that out. Don't use it in front of me though. =P

I just took a picture of the mooncake. It isn't bengawan solo this year, but it still looks damn good! Right now, stupid blogger is not letting me upload the picture. Damn it. I will get it up by all means..

OMG LIKE FINALLY! I tried to put up as a medium size picture for like at least 10 times! Still failed. And guess what? I tried to put up as a large size picture, once only and it was successful. That says something huh? =D It looks so nice.. Can't bear to eat it.. Thanks! "Even if it's poison, I'll still eat it."

Today is the 15th, and i swear to God, i miss you.

have i moved on?

2008-09-14T03:02:00.002+08:00

Lips Of An Angel - Hinder

Lips Of An Angel lyrics

Honey why you calling me so late?
It's kinda hard to talk right now.
Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay?
I gotta whisper cause I can't be too loud

Well, my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And, yes, I've dreamt of you too
And does he know you're talking to me
Will it start a fight
No I don't think she has a clue

Well my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

Honey why you calling me so late?

I just downloaded this song for my friend. Haven't listen to it for some time and yes, i'm doing it now. haha. It's kinda meaningful. Oh wells.. I'm suppose to be studying but i can't focus and do it. Damn. Another week to go but i don't think i can last. After mon, it'll be as good as prelims are over. But monday has chem and econs! again. rarh! I just went to youtube and listened to a few ricky martin songs. Somehow i had this urge to listen to them. His songs are damn damn nice, to me at least. Reminds me of the younger days, not that 18 is very old but yeah.. I wonder if people who reads my blog actually bother to click on the song and listen to it. haha. random. At least next time when i read up on my history i'll do it. =) Alright, i'm off to go study. Nite!

This is me.

2008-09-12T19:55:00.002+08:00

It's friday finally! Today's physics paper was a disaster to start with. Sigh. Didn't expect it to be so tough. Doubt i could get like 20 out of 60 marks? Shall not rant about my prelims. Another week to go!

I've got this song that keeps running through my mind every now and then. I just realised that there's an acoustic version of it so i'm gonna post it up here. Go check out the other version if you want.

This Is Me (Acoustic Full Version) - Demi Lovato

This Is Me

I've always been the kind of girl
that hid my face
so afraid to tell the world
what I've got to say
But I have this dream
right inside of me
I'm gonna
let it show
it's time
to let you know
to let you know

(chorus)This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
gonna let the light shine on me
now I've found who I am
there's no way to hold it in
no more hiding who I wanna be
this is me

Do you know what it's like
to feel so in the dark
to dream about a life
where your the shining star
even though it seems
like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
it's the only way

(chorus)
This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now
gonna let the light shine on me
now I've found who I am
there's no way to hold it in
no more hiding who I wanna be
this is me

your the voice i hear inside my head
the reason that im singing
i need to find you
i gotta find you
your the missin piece i need
the song in side of me
i need to find you
i gotta find you

(chorus)
This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
let the light shine on me
now I've found who I am
there's no way to hold it in
no more hiding who I wanna be
this is me

your the missin piece i need
the song in side of me
your the voice i hear in side my head
the reason that im singing

now I've found who I am
there's no way to hold it in
no more hiding who I wanna be
this is me

My streak of insomnia nights continued for the past 2 days or so. Couldn't fall asleep at the right times. Just turned and flipped about in bed for more than an hour. Total waste of my beauty sleep. And it made me so restless this morning. Sigh.. Oh yeah, I had this stroke of brilliance while studying physics yesterday. So i came up with this. wahaha..

i'm constantly thinking of you,
still dreaming i guess?
in a little world of my own,
love is something that's lacking.
with a wound so deep,
you left.

I can be a poet! Woo! I'm not really emo-ing. Just having my fair share of quiet times. Somehow i miss studying literature. Just the drama and poems part of it. haha. I shall go have my dinner!

Emo-chia! Don't emo le! If not you will infect me de. I don't really understand what's happening, but i know it's something that you can't do anything much about also. Perhaps all the commotions and rumours or whatsoever will die down as time passes. Don't think too much about prelims too. =) Cheer up! We shall go celebrate after my prelims!

it's friday tml!

2008-09-11T21:06:00.002+08:00

WOO!! It's almost friday! ONE more day to go! JIAYOU! Then i can finally have my weekly family bonding activity. No prizes for guessing. It's M-A-H-J-O-N-G! My hands are like damn itchy when i speak of it. Hm.. Last paper for the week is physics 2. Gonna go school for 1h15mins of paper? Complete waste of time. And somehow, i am not really concern about it. Shall go study after this though.

Yet another week has passed.. One more week to go to the end of prelims. A few more to go and it will be A's. I'm so going to mug mug mug after prelims. Really. I need to produce results for the first time. Prelims are a stepping stone. But i think i'm not gonna do well for it, at least i do see hope for once. =) Jiayou!

Er-jie! I shall dedicate this paragraph to you. Hm.. Your birthday chalet is like TOMORROW! Cheer up okie?! Don't always sound so emo and sad! 21st birthday celebration don't always come every year! Doubt i'll be able to attend due to my prelims. Sorry! But i do hope that you will enjoy urself and really have fun out there! Ur mum will be fine tml and it'll be a happy day for you. Yup! Must take care and don't get drunk ah! And eat more satayS! =D

p.s. I still miss you, for some reason..

take a break.

2008-09-10T00:26:00.003+08:00

Finally. 2 days of prelims are over. Let's see.. Econs 2, Chem 3, Maths 1, Physics 3 down. 6 more papers to go. Everything will end by next fri! Kambatte! Can't wait. I think i did quite badly for the 4 papers already. sigh.. Some wasn't that difficult but well, my answers obviously weren't that accurate. Now that it's over, i wouldn't wanna think about it too.

I'm suffering from withdrawal symtoms. Not that i'm into drugs or wat. But MAHJONG! LOL! Just wanna play it like so damn badly now. Guess i've to wait till at least friday before i can feed my addiction. I'm so mentally drained by prelims that my eyes are half opened as i type this. So i shall go have an early night. Cya folks! =D

Hope you are able to cope with all your school work and stuff. Don't stress ah!

xinying. jiayou! xD

prelims!

2008-09-07T15:53:00.003+08:00

COUNTDOWN TO PRELIMS!! WOO!!

Well, i'm nowhere near finish with my preparations for prelims. So dead. I didn't realise the timetable was so screwed up and I haven't really done much for maths. ARGH! That's my best subject and i'm so going to do badly this time. sigh.. And now i'm so mugging for econs which i hope i can pass for the first time. =(

Enough of all the prelims shit. There's a food fair ongoing now at suntec city! I am so keen on going. My mum asked if i wanna go with them since yesterday. What was my response? NO. damn it. I freaking and reluctantly said no. I really wanted to go, but somehow deep down, i told myself i shouldn't do that. I just feel like going out and not stay at home. It is just not me to stay at home for days and not going out. Well, i just hope all these would end and i could take a break.

I guess i'll be stuck in singapore this dec. No overseas trips planned. All those who keep entertaining the idea of going overseas, didn't bother to do anything about it. This includes me obviously. Yeah, all these procrastinations are coming back to haunt me as the hols draw near. SOMEONE PLEASE BRING ME OVERSEAS!

Cascada - Miracle - Cascada

Miracle

Boy meets girl
You were my dream,my world
But i was blind
You cheated on me from behind
So on my own
I feel so all alone
Though I know it's true
I'm still in love with you

(chorus)
I need a miracle
I wanna be your girl
Give me a chance to see
That you are made for me
I need a miracle
Please let me be your girl
One day you'll see it can happen to me
I need a miracle
I wanna be your girl
Give me a chance to see
That you are made for me
I need a miracle
Please let me be your girl
One day you'll see it can happen to me
It can happen to me

Miracle... Miracle [echo]

Day and night
I'm always by your side
Cause I know for sure
My love is real my feelings pure
So take a try
No need to ask me why
Cause I know it's true
I'm still in love with you

(chorus)

Miracle... Miracle [echo]

Miracle... Miracle [echo]

I really need a miracle now. *prays* hope everything goes well. All the best to you folks having your prelims. And those who are trying to study for A's. Take care!

This is a picture of my not-so-chocolatey double chocolate drink and my friend's latte. You know why? We got it mixed up. How dumb can we get?

the roundabout.

2008-09-04T20:29:00.003+08:00

Is It You? - Cassie

Artist: Cassie
Song: Is It You

Lyrics:

I'm looking for a lover not a friend
Somebody who can be there when I need someone to talk to
I'm looking for someone who won't pretend
Somebody not afraid to say the way they feel about you

And I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel,
Someone who can keep me real and who knows always
Baby I like to have you in my way
And I'm looking for someone who takes me there,
Wants to share, shows he cares
Thinking on the one that I've been waiting for

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me?
Could you be the one I need?

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me? (Could you be?)
Could you be the one I need?

I'm looking for someone to share my pain (Uh)
Someone who I can run to, who would stay with me when it rains
Someone who I can cry with trough the night
Someone who I can trust who's hardest right
And I'm looking for someone

And I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel,
Someone who can keep me real and who knows always
Baby I like to have you in my way
And I'm looking for someone who takes me there,
Want to share, shows he cares
Thinking on the one that I've been waiting for

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me?
Could you be the one I need?

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me?
Could you be this one I need?

Take for grant
How much I care (How much I care)
And appreciates that I'm there
Someone who listens
And someone I can call who isn't afraid of thought to share

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me?
Could you be the one I need?

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me?
Could you be the one I need?

Lately i'm so into emo songs, which i don't think is a good sign. LOL! oh well, just had buffet lunch at sakura not too long ago and now i'm eating my dinner. Gonna grow fat man. Now all i does is eat, sleep, study, use com. I think i'm bound to get fat. damn. lalala..

Oh, i managed to get hold of the priceless photo taken by the great philosopher cum photographer.

such an emo shot anyway. =D

youtube videos.

2008-09-03T21:47:00.003+08:00

I was so bored for the past 2 days that i've watched quite a number of youtube videos. The following are just some of the few more interesting ones from different genres. haha.

A crazy indian video - Buffalaxed

Futsal skills - Panna Attack

Bulgarian Idol singing "ken lee" (MUST WATCH!)

I'm just too bored so yeah.. The last video did make me laugh like no one's business.. haha. Yeah. I shall go study already. =)

mooncakes!

2008-09-03T01:30:00.003+08:00

It's like 1.30am right now and i'm munching away on my daily dosage of oreos. But my supply of oreos is diminishing at an increasing rate! Only left with the last packet for tomorrow. And for the first time, i tried dipping them in milk before eating. Not much difference though, just softer i guess? Lolx. Physics is slowly killing me right now. Can't seem to grasp certain concepts as hard as i tried, maybe coz i'm dumb. lalala..

The mooncake festival is coming soon! WHEE! Mooncakes! I love them. But not all kinds. I just love the ones with icy skin? Not really sure how you call them. You get what i mean. I'm looking forward to more mooncakes! Wonder if anyone will get for me this year? *hints hints* Last year someone gave me a box of bengawan solo's mooncakes, this year anyone wanna beat that? haha.. Just kidding! I'll drop by somewhere to get some soon, and perhaps get for my family as well.

Gonna drop by school tomorrow to clarify some doubts with my econs teacher and then get a haircut after that. LIKE OMG FINALLY! So long that i feel so hot every now and then. Can't stand it. That would mean hours of travelling and waiting, when i could be sitting down and studying. Sigh.

Somehow i think that for every girl out there, there'll be a guy that suits you. vice versa. So don't worry 'bro'! Sure got some handsome guy fall for you, and definitely better than the fool you're consoling. LOL! i've put in the inverted commas btw, so people won't think you're really a guy. And just a moment ago i told someone this, "our fate lies in our own hands", but honestly, i don't really believe it. But i do believe we can make choices in our lives, and it's up to us essentially to make the best decisions for ourselves. Agree folks?

Alright. I'm back to studying. Just spent like 15 mins writing this. Haven't got any interesting pictures to put up lately so bear with me yeah. gd nite! =)

Let's just leave things as status quo. Things wouldn't revert back to the past even if we want it to, as much as i want to. Perhaps "someday we'll meet at the roundabout, and we could start all over again."

P.s the above quote was from a great philosopher cum photographer.

last day of the month.

2008-08-31T23:51:00.003+08:00

Hm.. 31st of august today. Decided to come blog before the month ends. Perhaps coz this month was super happening for me and loads of things happened so it would be nice to just wrap things up. Ohoh! i think keeping a blog lets you look back on your past when you want to, but the problem is looking back at my past makes me feel that i'm stupid. damn it.

Oh well, actually i've nothing much to write. LOL!! But i know prelims like next week. Really exactly starting in 7 days time once it's past 12. I spent the entire week going through the whole econs syllabus but i dun think it helps much. Gonna make an appointment to see my econs tutor to sort things out abit. I'm damn touched when she said she would come down to school just for my sake. So i hoped i wun let her down again this time.

I didn't know my blog receives so many hits everyday. Not say alot but still there's at least a few. Maybe one day i will become a commercial blogger or sth? =DD just kidding. It would bore my readers to death i think. Oh yeah! The baby's coming back tml as it's a weekday! Can't wait to play with him!

I guess the one and only thing i regretted was perhaps not insisting that we let others know we were together bah. I really didn't mind being so secretive bout it since you didn't wanted others to know. But come to think of it, perhaps things would have been much better if the others know. This few nights of insomnia kept me thinking bout our past. Made me wanna go ice skate as well! Still haven't got the confidence to skate myself.

Lately i've been having alot of cravings for food. Sushi. Mos burger. Carls junior. Still alot more. Been stuck at home for so long that i feel like i've lost contact with the outside world. Other than the occasional buzzes on my hp which still remind me i'm in modern civilisation, i really feel like a caveman otherwise. And i need a haircut real badly before school reopens. But the time spent travelling and waiting is really a big deterrent. Rarh! The weather lately has been very condusive, for sleeping. LOL!

For now, i shall go make my daily cup of coffee and try my best to stay awake for another 3 hours. Welcome september! cya folks!

7 things.

2008-08-29T01:13:00.002+08:00

7 Things - 2008 - Miley Cyrus

I probably shouldn't say this
But at times I get so scared
When I think about the previous
Relationship we shared
It was awesome but we lost it
It's not possible for me not to care

And now we're standing in the rain
But nothings ever gonna change
Until you hear, my dear

The 7 things I hate about you
The 7 things I hate about you, oh you

You're vain
Your games
You're insecure
You love me you like her
You made me laugh, you made me cry
I don't know which side to buy

Your friends they're jerks when you act like them
Just know it hurts
I want to be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do
You make me love you

It's awkward and silent as I wait for you to say
What I need to hear now is your sincere apology
When you mean it I'll believe it
If you text it I'll delete it
Let's be clear
Oh I'm not coming back
Your taking seven steps here

Compared to all the great things
That would take too long to write
I probably should mention the 7 that I like

The 7 things I like about you
Your hair
Your eyes
Your old Levi's
When we kiss I'm hypnotized

You make me laugh, you make me cry
But I guess that's both I'll have to buy
Your hands in mine when we're intertwined
Everything's alright
I want to be with the one I know

And the 7th thing I like the most that you do
You make me love you
You do

There you go. Another song that i've heard quite a number of times over the radio and seemed to caught my attention. It's gonna be the weekend once again! How time flies.. Tomorrow is teacher's day celebration but i'm not going school. Awww.. It's not that i don't like my teachers, but it's just too big an opportunity cost since i had to travel so far to go school. And i had this very lovely present intended for a teacher but i haven't finish preparing so yeah..

I'm going so slow in my revision that. Sigh.. The entire econs syllabus is making me go crazy! damn it. I swear i'll burn the notes after my A levels. It's one whole bloody thick stack. The private cost would be the cleanup i have to do after burning them. The external costs incurred would be the health problems suffered by my family members or anyone who happened to inhale the fumes of smoke produced as a result of the burning of my notes. Maybe it will cause some massive block fire that will damage public property as well. That's econs for you. lalala.. for now, i'll try to love econs.

Stuck at home the whole day with only the computer and my notes as companions. Life totally sucks man. Can't wait for all this to end. I need to get a life. I feel like going to the movies. Do you? =)

one paper down.

2008-08-27T00:59:00.003+08:00

Since i'm not really in a mood to study now, i shall blog.

Well, thank god GP is over! haha. But then i think i kinda screw up my essay coz i interpreted the question in a funny way.. It's the first time i attempted a question on the "environment" as well. So let's see how it goes. I almost fell asleep during the compre damn it. Maybe it's due to the lack of sleep the previous night. Thanks to someone who tell me wat possibility shit.. Make me keep dwelling upon it.

I'm trying to read econs at this unearthly hour.. i figured that no matter how i read or memorise, i just can't seem to reproduce them and do well. Rarh! Shall go find my econs tutor tml in a despertate bid to save my dying situation. She's not a good teacher to begin with, but sadly, she's my only hope.

Staying at home the entire day makes me feel so sick. Feels like i'm being quarantined. The worst thing is i can't settle down properly and study. And now my lifestyle has switched to a nocturnal mode.. Wouldn't be awake until like 12noon at least. Sleep also has to wait till 3am or so. Maybe till then i will be just too tired and i'll just sleep coz there's a need to.

I'm just thinking why my life is so messed up now. I just feel like going to the beach and SCREAM! RARH! Bottled up frustrations. Must maintain. But seriously, i haven't done that before i think? Not that i remember at least. Maybe one day i shall try. Sometimes i wish i could grow up faster. And drive a car! Eh, recently i keep visualising myself driving ok.. But ironically, sometimes i wish i could go back to the past. Maybe then i would not do things that i will come to regret. Or do things that i regretted not doing.

In short, we should really just cherish what we have currently, and not feel the pain when we lose them.

I told you i was driving..

sometimes a moment of rashness was all it takes.

stat counter.

2008-08-24T21:53:00.002+08:00

I've decided to put a stat counter on my blog. Partly coz i thought it would be quite interesting to know how many people visits my blog since i don't publicise it unnecessarily. And also because i read in the papers that there could be online stalkers. HAHA! How does it feel like to be stalked? Well.. I wanna find out but i don't wanna experience it for myself of coz. lalala..

Just now i played this boardgame called 'RISK' with my siblings. It was damn bloody fun man! Haven't played it since like ages ago and i'm still as good. But in the end i lost. It's definitely not because i am lousy.. =p It's just because my brother totally manipulated my sister to his advantage. EH! It's not an excuse ok! Well, it's just a game.. It did teach me that you should have a direction urself and not allow someone to completely manipulate you. Life issue hor..

It's 10! damn.. I still have quite some readings to do. So i shall keep this short. I really hope i could do much better for tml! JIAYOU HENRY! =D

i'm still falling for you

2008-08-24T03:14:00.007+08:00

I'm still "falling for you"

Still can't get that song out of my head. lalala.. Maybe i would get too sick of it soon and stopped listening to it. It's like 3plus already and i'm still here blogging. Was reading my kaleidoscope but it got too boring for me. And guess who was keeping me company through this 2 hours or so. My ex. Haha. The constant vibrating of the phone kept me awake i guess? LOL! So thanks alot! But well, i realised we smsed more than we did last time. How last time i couldn't remember..

Prelims' GP is on mon! which is like TOMMORROW! *presses panic button* I really don't know how to prepare for it exactly. By just reading essays and looking through my past compres or other work, it still doesn't make me feel more confident. I've never gotten higher than a D for GP. It's so disturbing.. Now all the big words are floating around in my mind but i can't seemed to use any of them here. haha.

There's olympics basketball finals later. 2.30pm! LIVE on channel U or 5 i think. Not going to miss it. So hopefully i can wake up earlier and do some studying before i go watch. This year's olympics was quite spectecular given all the hype surrounding athletes like Phelps and Bolt. Perhaps you wouldn't be able to see it again at the next olympics? 2012 London. By then i would be in uni i guess? MAYBE i will be there to watch it live? LOL! dreaming huh.. oh well..

The following is a personality test which works out quite accurately for me. Quite is the word. So if urs ain't accurate, it's not my fault. But do check it out.

http://memoriter.net/flash/test.html

Stupid blogger is stopping me from uploading pictures. Damn irritating. I'm gonna go back to reading essays and then to my dreamland. Have a great weekend! nite. =)

Traffic jam anyone? haha.

I've learned there's such an abbreviation as 'bff'.

fall for you.

2008-08-21T20:02:00.012+08:00

A song that i'm crazy over currently.

Song lyrics | Fall For You lyrics

This song kept repeating in my mind after the first time i heard it on the radio. Didn't think it was very nice at the start. But it just crept slowly upon me and now it's all over me.. haha. It somehow just trigger lots of thoughts. post-relationship thoughts i guessed. But either way, it's really a great song and i would recommend it to you people out there!

Prelims are going to come like damn soon. I feel so unprepared. So naked. Still have quite some way to go in my revision. Sigh. Even still, I need more than a miracle i guess. I feel like going overseas to study. *dreams on* This last part of the marathon has proved more tiring than it could be..

hm.. future F1 driver in the making??

It's time to move on..

damn pictures.

2008-08-14T22:23:00.009+08:00

Hm.. i've decided to sort of revamp my blog with more pictures. LOL! Since i haven't been uploading pics for like damn damn long. It's been one week since my first blood donation..

Looks quite cool huh.. Must paste the "Be nice, this is my first time sticker" on my chest so that the nurse will be nice to me. LOL. But it was really scary can. The needle was like super duper extremely big! And my nurse can still tell me she adjust the needle while the needle was inside my vein. damn it. But not bad lar. At least it wasn't as pain as i thought it would be. AND! MY blood is a very precious coz its a rare kind. So i'm a super life-saver! haha.

And this is a super cute baby that my mum is looking after currently. Well, my mum decided to become a nanny all of a sudden. Not much different to me though. Maybe sometimes i get to play with this kiddo when i come home early. But he's not even a year old yet and he can't walk still, so there's not much i can do with him other than making weird noises. LOL! Nonetheless, got another person in the family makes it more "re4 nao4"!

Wah.. This is seriously not working out for me.. Make until so pek chek.. But anyway, this is a classis scene from my GP lesson. Haven been bothers to put this up until like now when i find it damn amusing. Oh, the teacher is like standing at the far end near the window although i couldn't keep him within the frame. So as you can see, i'm one of the few survivors. =D *applause*

I've enough of stupid blogger for the day. Stupid pictures upload so slow. RARH! Ok. I shall go study. Today is super unproductive.. So looking forward to the weekend! And i did this freaking personality quiz thingy yesterday which is absolutely disturbing. Shan't think about it. Bathe and study. Cya!

sweet.

2008-08-11T17:27:00.001+08:00

Just randomly uploaded this. Maybe this will inspire me to upload more pics from now on.

national day weekend.

2008-08-11T17:03:00.003+08:00

9th of aug! Happy National Day! I couldn't use words to describe the fireworks once again. haha. 4th time and i swear this is the BEST! I watched with my two newly found sisters! can we still be sisters after what had happened? Hm.. my planned surprise was a total failure but i shouldn't have put so much hope into it actually. Sigh.. I guess things are just meant to be that way. Not to worry, i'm still going strong.

Then that very night, we had a drink-and-cards session! I swear i was almost drunk. I could feel it in me.. My mind was wide awake, but i couldn't control my actions totally. But that feeling was kinda great? It somehow made me take off that strong mask of mine so that i could let off some steam. Really had a great night! We should do it again! Thanks SISTERS!

I guess this signals an end to the paths that we took together. It's not going to be easy. We've come this far. But some things can't be forced. Since you've chosen to walk away, i won't stop you. I didn't expect it to hurt as much as it did. But it was nothing compared to what i felt for the past few weeks. If ever one day our paths met again, you will still occupy a special place in me. So should you stumble as you walk, i'll be there.

Happy Birthday. uoyevoli.
Hope you'll have a super great birthday! =D

"wasted" weekend

2008-08-03T23:57:00.003+08:00

I swear this is the most unproductive weekend i have had. Totally no work done, no studying, and hell i have chem test on tues when i'm gonna go movie tml. GG-fied. I shall stop ranting coz it will never end.

But well, i discovered something within myself which i haven quite dare to accept for super long. The past 2 weeks had been real slow, partly coz i have been spending my days studying in school. This is a good thing on the other hand as it keeps my mind occupied rather than thinking too much. The bus journeys home after that are quite torturing though coz it's when all the emo shit happens. damn it. I've no time for such stuff now and i doubt she has time for me either. Prelims are in one month's time? SO PLEASE START STUDYING SERIOUSLY!

Yesterday's fireworks were A-W-E-S-O-M-E!! I really can't described how pretty it was. Maybe my partner there made it even prettier. haha. Well, thanks for the company. It was only 4 plus hours, but that was more than enough to cheer me up greatly. I knew i could count on you. Sorry for being so down at times but i did try to smile. =D oh yeah, you looked better in your new look and with makeup. 3 cheers for you!

This post looks kinda long to me. And i spent another 10 freaking minutes to get this done. I'm gonna go off to sleep. Tired to the power of infinity. Gd nite.

You were the one that made me believe, but now you are the one that made me lose faith.

I spent the entire 2 weeks making a card for you when my art is god damn bloody lousy. I stopped for 2 days coz i really had no motivation to do it. Your present is more or less done. So i shall just hope you would like it as it may well be the last thing i got for you. I love you, but i wanna stop hurting myself

emo-ing

2008-07-18T01:43:00.002+08:00

I'm back again. it's almost 2 in the middle of the night. BUt i'm still awake and blogging! haha. Well, that's coz i'm skipping school tml to go watch dark knight with my friend. Hm.. She better thanked me man.. 4 periods of lessons only. Hoped i dun miss much. I'm getting tired. These days i've tried to study, and do my work. I did do my tutorials lately, that's an achievement considering i haven done a single tutorial since last year. haha. i dunno why i don't seem to be afraid or wat even when i know time is running out. There's sth wrong with me!

Lately i have a tendency to think alot, which i dunno if it's a good thing or a bad thing. haha. I once asked this friend of mine, "do you think girls are complicated?" And the reply was, " that's because you guys think too much." But the prob is, if you girls aren't complicated, we won't be thinking so much. lols. Sometimes i really don't understand. Maybe someone can enlighten me.

Now i'm in love with this song!

"Invisible" by Taylor Swift

She can’t see the way your eyes light up when you smile
She’ll never notice how you stop and stare whenever she walks by
And you can’t see me wantin you the way you want her
But you are everything to me
[Chorus:]
And I just wanna show you
She don’t even know you
She's never gonna love you like I want to
You just see right through me but if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful miracle unbelievable instead of just invisible
There’s a fire inside of you that can’t help but shine through
She’s never gonna see the light
No matter what you do
And all I think about is how to make you think of me
And everything that we could be
[Chorus]
Like shadows in a faded light
Oh we’re Invisible
I just wanna look in your eyes and make you realize
I just wanna show you she don’t even know you
Baby let me love you let me want you
You just see right through me
But if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful miracle unbelievable instead of just invisible
She can’t see the way your eyes light up when you smile.

have you ever wondered how it felt like to be left there like an idiot holding on to the phone?

past week

2008-07-12T02:20:00.002+08:00

hm.. had been a hectic week. Last saturday's outing with my pri sch friends certainly was a great one! same old times, but the number just gets smaller. Well, hope this doesn't soemday dissolve into thin air. I believed pri sch friends are the most ........ Dunno how to describe. Maybe reliable? or whatever it is. Just knew this bunch of people are gonna be the best friends that i had.

My results were kinda sucky. Sigh. REaly dunno how to transform an S into an A. Need a miracle i guess. I don't dare to think about it, don't dare to look too far. I just hope things will turn out fine when the time comes. Jiayou to all you people too!

I suppose things are never gonna be easy. I need much more self discipline, i need much more self control, i need to think twice next time. Don't wanna repeat the same mistake again.

AND I'M SO IN NEED OF MONEY! FREAKING BROKE! RARH!

RARH!

2008-06-28T13:35:00.002+08:00

COMMON TESTS ARE OFFICIALLY OVER!! *applause* now it's time to go out, have fun and play mahjong! Woo!! Haven started on my winning spree leh. I need to earn some money to buy my stuff you see. Haha. I'm like so bloody tempted to buy the bag already. It's on a 10 percent discount somemore! Wth lar. Super tempting. Damn it.

Yeah. those were the happy times. Haha. Sadly, things aren't as rosy as it seems! But i wun let this affect my post exam mood! i've already past the emo stage so now, i wan to DOTA and play MAHJONG! RARH!

WISHLIST

2008-06-12T13:58:00.002+08:00

I've managed to come up with a wishlist! It was kinda random but yeah.. =D

2008-06-08T13:45:00.002+08:00

Back after super long. Oh well, season's over and yeah, got 3rd. Not bad huh. Considering how much effort i put in. *applause* Now it's time to get down to work. But it is seriously not going as planned. And i still have my youth cup competition ongoing. Just came back from overseas trip. WAh!! No time. But it is just lousy excuses i've been giving myself. I'm really damn scared if you can't really tell from my face. haha. I also dunno how to deal with this pressure that's building up.

Running out of time, so many commitments. Maybe someday you will understand how i feel.

2008-04-27T23:10:00.003+08:00

Tml's A' div match against TJC. Gonna be a crucial one. A deciding one. If we are gonna win this, maybe our chances of getting to the semis would be better. If i'm not gonna feature much in the game, at least i hope to push the team through. I will give it my all, i promised. I believed we can make it. Go VJ BBALL! =D

I cried, and it wasn't tears of joy.

I never had the courage to just walked away like i did. Today i found it, you gave me the courage to do so. I dunno if this signals the end, but i still hold on coz i believe.

updates

2008-04-16T22:49:00.002+08:00

Haven't been blogging for quite some time. Just a quick update here. Oh ya! I'm officially 18 as of 30th march! haha. Had quite a good celebration i would say. Although it was kinda maluating.. Shall not mentioned the details. I just wanna thank those who had gave me presents or cakes or whatsoever! Really very nice of you all! =D moving on. HAd been on a emotional roller coaster these period of time. Sigh. Lots of things happened, but i will peservere! jiayou!

And brother! Don't let ur relationship get onto the rocks ah! Must communicate! you can do it de! =D If you ever need a listening ear, i will be here.

HER2! you should know who you are! i know you are a very brave girl! And you must continue to be as brave ok! Plus thanks for all your encouragement for my season! Those words meant alot to me! =)

Well, A' Divs have finally begun and we've won our first 2 games. But i didn't really contributed much actually. Sometimes i don't understand wat the coach is doing anyway. If he really doesn't want me to play then he better not want me to win the game for him someday. Feeling so fucked up on the bench.

the journey begins.

2008-03-05T18:44:00.002+08:00

A DIV'S GROUPINGS

GUYS

Group A : HCI, ACSI, MI, NYJC, SRJC

Group B : IJC, RJC, SAJC, TPJC, MJC

Group C : TJC, ACJC, YJC, PJC, VJC

Group D : AJC, CJC, JJC, NJC

GIRLS

Group A : VJC, DHS, TJC, NJC

Group B : RJC, JJC, ACJC, YJC

Group C : HCI, NYJC, PJC, MI

Group D : AJC, SAJC, SRJC, TPJC

tonight i wanna cry

2008-02-22T23:41:00.003+08:00

I think i shall adopt this song as my new favourite song.

Artist: Urban Keith
Song: Tonight I Wanna Cry

Alone in this house again tonight
I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine
There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me
The way that it was and could have been surrounds me
I'll never get over you walkin' away

(Chorus:)I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

Would it help if I turned a sad song on
"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone
Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters
It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better
But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with this pride, let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

Somehow this song seemed to encapsulate all my thoughts and emotions for the night. It's always been like that i guess? If only i had taken a different path maybe life wouldn't have been so tough right now? Common tests coming in 2 weeks. 1 week and 2 days to study to be exact. I have no idea how i'm going to cramp everything within this period of time. It's simply impossible. I guess i'll have to readjust my timetable and give up more shitass relaxation time.. Sigh. Getting so stressed up. Not like i dun wanna study for ct right? I'm at a loss of wat to do now. If you know wat i should do now, tell me! It may be helpful.. haha.

Someone asked me this question 10 mins ago, "if given a choice, would you be a guy or a girl?"
After thinking for 30 seconds (i'm surprised i even have to think actually), i told the person i still wanna be a guy. Given my character, i could hardly be a girl. And i can't imagine myself having to put on make up and having menstrual cramps! LOL. Oh wells, i'm just not cut out to be a girl. On the other hand, that friend chose to be a girl coz of i-dunno-wat reasons..

I think these few days i'm under a curse. I kept misplacing my stuff and losing them. On thur i left my hp pouch in school at the bball court without realising it. Damn was i so stupid to not realise it until i board the bus home. All i could do was pray that it would still be there when i go look for it the next day. After a while, i screamed out, "wat if it fucking rains??" Actually it's not the pouch that matters to me, it's the monkey i had on it. Oh well, thank god i found it the next day. The next moment i know, i lost my contact lens casing! How unlucky can i get lar. RARH!

Anyways, i'm like having some going-to-die cough. I cough every 10 secs or so and i could feel the pain in my throat like almost every sec. I run abit, cough abit. Feel so breathless the whole time. Actually i can't even run lar. I tried chasing someone just now and i always collapse i think. Hope it's just some persistant cough and not some shit virus or wat. And my flu ain't helping at all. Like some free flow drink once it starts flowing. shall stop describing all the gross stuff. In short, I'm seriously sick. =(

WOW! I'm amazed at how long this post is. Guessed today is blogging day! alright then. perhaps i should just stop here, go take my medicine and sleep already. OH i haven open my angbaos!! okie dokes. CYA then!

I need...

2008-02-03T21:36:00.001+08:00

I need some self assurance.

I need some motivation.

I need to start doing my tutorials.

I need to stay awake in lessons.

I need to get my As.

I need...

2008-01-13T23:35:00.001+08:00

one day i will learn to let go..

2008!

2008-01-01T15:52:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! So fast another year has passed. I really do not know what to anticipate this year.. So much is gonna changed. Hope i'll be able to manage my time wisely this time. Spent my time in sch last year sleeping away practically.. But this year is like much more important. I don't know how i'm gonna do it. But i will do it. From S to A. HAHA. All you people out there also better buck up! I wish everyone out there the best in whatever they do, and have a fruitful 2008!

New Year Resolution
1. Not sleep in lessons and pay more attention
2. Get back my motivation to play ball in vj
3. Study hard and start getting my As
4. To be a great bf for you

P.S I miss you.

I'm going HK!!

2007-12-02T01:26:00.000+08:00

it's already the start of DEC! That's like so fast.. And i'm going to hongkong in like 2 days? haha.. CAn't wait for it.. Have been like waiting for this trip since like long ago.. lols. Well, my patience is finally paying off..

life hasn't been any much more interesting lately.. won my friendly match against maris that day. But i played kinda badly and got scolded by coach.. sigh. Shall try to improve next time bah.. At least i'm gonna take a break from training for a week. =D so bored of trainings..

the thought of having 2 R-papers is so demoralising.. haven even started studying lar.. RARH! Really dunno how things will turn out when sch reopens.. BUt i am not gonna let it spoil my holidays! like never! Enjoy while you still can HENRY!!

Sometimes i just need someone to support me and be my pillar of strength when i'm weak or when i'm falling. I feel so exhausted, so tired at times..

"if meeting you was coincidental, loving you was not."

=D

2007-10-29T04:01:00.000+08:00

Has been some time since i blogged here. Well, to start off, promo results aren't really any fantastic. But at least i managed to scrape through. *applause* Really dunno how i am going to make it next year. Sigh..

Trainings are tiring as usual, and boring.. Kept doing the same drills over and over again. It helps seriously. But not when it bores you everytime. argh.. I love to go down to my own court to play ball nowadays. almost everyday..Maybe coz i know alot of ppl now bah.. This also allows me to learn from them. Having the feeling that i've improved! WAHAHA..

Obstacles are always there ahead of us. Whether is it PW or whatsoever, we have to overcome them. As for urs, i will always be there to cheer you on. =D Jiayous!

I shouldn't be here blogging at this time but i can't seem to sleep. Oh wells, tml got my dreaded pw meeting! damn. So i'm gonna go watch abit of harry potter and go to sleep. GD nite!

prays

2007-09-24T12:49:00.000+08:00

Tml's the start. And THE END. haha. I'm praying already.. I feel damn unprepared. So scared lar. Sigh. Just another week to go. Let me get it done and over with. jiayous henry! jiayous to everyone too! let's finish promos so we can all chill, play dota, play ball and go out! And i haven watch 881! sianz.. oh ya, this year my mooncake festival no mooncake to eat. damn. Oh well.. Nvm lar. just another festival afterall. I saw some kids playing with candles yesterday night. my childhood..

wished i was out there playing candles too..

=(

2007-09-09T22:54:00.000+08:00

so wat if i can play ball?

so wat if i top the scoring chart today?

does it matter when the team loses?

lols. Sigh.. I dunno why things are like this.. Heaven's been so unfair to me.. I gave it my all. In the end, i dun get anything in return. I didn't expect anything, but well.. The least i could say is i'm disappointed. =(

no promises.

2007-09-06T16:52:00.000+08:00

Sometimes things just can't be forced.

Choosing to give up would be an alternative at times.

Maybe one day you would understand why. =D

swollen hips

2007-09-05T12:17:00.000+08:00

sigh.. my hips aren't getting better.. Can't even lie to my right when i sleep. =( hm.. anw, i'm finally getting into the mood to study already. haha..

无论是什么感情，只要没有信任，就会慢慢失去它真正的意义

random quote. I'm off to study then. Cya.

stress?

2007-09-03T23:09:00.000+08:00

Hm.. Promos are coming in like 3 weeks.. But i'm like still wasting time doing all sorts of nonsense stuff. Well, at least i managed to quit playing DOTA.. I took out the disc and gave it to my mum.. Lols. CAn you believe it? well, believe it coz i really did.

Well, i guess everyone's like mugging hard in their own way somehow or another while i'm slacking. i feel so shitty.. I wanted to mug too.. But i'm always not in the mood or i'm lazy.. wth. These are all excuses i've been giving myself. Sigh.. But what to do.. If only i were more disciplined..

Anw, i realised that playing basketball was the happiest thing that ever happened in my life. Maybe i am not that good at it, but at least when i play with it, i feel like myself. There's no need for me to hide my true self nor act like i'm someone else. Perhaps.. It was a blessing choosing it as my sport after all.

I'm trying to stay focused. I'm trying real hard. BUt i guessed i've failed terribly so far.. sigh.. This sucks. When will i get back the old self that is full of confidence?

*When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

I just need someone to be there for me. At least i've true friends to fall back on. =D Alright then, mug hard people!

=(

2007-07-04T23:22:00.000+08:00

Silently falling into depression i think? haha. It's so stupid actually. Maybe i am like thinking too much for my own good? But wat can i do? I can't help it either.

Common tests results are coming out soon. I have done badly and i didn't dare to look at my results when they come back. lols. hopefully it doesn't turn out as bad as i thought it would be. Come on.. pray for me!! =D

bball hasn't been giving me the satisfaction nor joy in life that i needed lately. seemed to find myself struggling to smile at times. Why do i have such a sad life?

Oh.. I've decided not to care so much in order to lead a happier life. If you really care for me, show it.

A Div' Finals

2007-05-26T00:40:00.000+08:00

National Champions! We did it! Finally! The long awaited trophy is finally in our possession. Congratsto the girls who have did so well and did the whole school proud. At least that stopped RJ from getting another champion. Really was damn happy lar.. It was a close fight and i was so scared that they would lose.. well, i pray and pray and pray damn hard!!! And phew.. We manage to hang on for the win. once again, CONGRATULATIONS!!

To the guys, i'm sorry that this year we dind't have any achievements. IF only i wasn't injured and able to contribute to the team. Maybe we would have gotten into the top 4 or even the finals. haha.. dream on! but really. well, it's over so move on dude. Next up, youth cup. Dunno wat to expect of it but hopefully i would be able to play well if i get to play. yeah.

it's over?

2007-05-06T23:58:00.000+08:00

haiz.. bone fracture.. That wast the cause of the pain that was hindering me from playing in the A divs. now all hopes of playing i guess is more or less over le bah? wat can i say? but it's like recovering damn fast leh.. i can run slowly now.. coz i dun dare to exert. i dunno lar.. but i should just sit down and not train since the doc say i shouldn't play for 3 freaking months!! =(

2nd round draw was kinda bad. it's like a killer group lar.. HCI, VJ, SA, AJ. Wat can be worse than that. But nonetheless, i believe we will be able to get into the semis. It's just whether we will get a good placing or not. Well, i will cheer my hearts out for you guys fighting for vj out there.. I can't play but i will be there to morally support you all! We will do it. Vj bball, my life, my love. Wed will be the test, and we will come out of it stronger, better.

Sch life sucks. I dun wanna talk about it. Chem spa tml.. haiz. i screw up my physics spa!! my x-axis was below the 0 value for the y-axis.. wtf man.. how stupid can i get.. lols. oh and PW is so killing me slowly lar.. Hope it doesn't get to you ppl.. i go sleep le. nitex.

damn it..

2007-05-03T00:20:00.000+08:00

2 weeks into the season already.. But i haven't play at all.. only had like 2 mins of playtime in total. And those were the most painful 2 minutes of my career... Now i'm here with suspected muscle tear and so i've to sit out the past 3 matches.. I felt so damn sad. How i wish i was on court running about.. Today against tpjc, the match was a fluke. We almost lost. Looking back, tp was leading in the 4th quarter. How i wish i could stand up and tell coach to put me down. BUt well, i would have contributed nothing if i had gone in anyway. So i just sat there and cheer on. Henry!! faster recover lar.. I wan to play!! I can't help but feel helpless as i watch my team struggled and fight on to win the match. If only i wasn't injured, things would have been different. No one will ever understand the pain inside, how badly it hurts when you want to play yet u can't. You know? no one will be there to emphatise with me..

Start of the journey.

2007-04-19T23:06:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow's the day. The start of the national A divisions. It seemed so fast. And everything would be over in a month or so. Hm.. Dunno what to expect this year actually. Sigh. I really hope and hope and hope!!! to play at toa payoh! national finals! Never played at a national finals before. Call it desperate or whatsoever, but i will really fight for this chance to win the title. People might not see us as potential title contenders, but we will show them. Vj bball, we can do it. I'm gonna go rest. I'll be back tml with good results. ACSI. You watch it.

one of my darker days..

2007-04-08T22:27:00.000+08:00

somtimes i wish...

throughout my life, i wished for alot of things. Some came true, some didn't. What came true of coz made me happy, wat didn't make me grow up coz i've to make do with what i have. haha. i realise my "wat and what" kinda inconsistent but whatever. sigh. It's not really a good day to start with. I woke up at like 9 plus coz i mahjong till like 3am ytd night.. haha. won a fair bit but dun think it's a lot bah. Then went down to ahs to play ball in the afternoon. My leg still kinda hurts when i run vigourously. Damn. Season in like less than 2 weeks. F***. better heal fast. It's damn important to me, just as it is to someone. Trained so hard for it. not going to just get kicked out in the first 2 rounds. And the team wanna shave! But if shave and got no results, how disastrous can it get? will be so malu-ated!! sigh..

I dunno wat's going on in my mind at the moment. I just wanna be alone. But i keep hearing voices. Thinking about the past isn't helping. Someone out there, come rescue me.

update

2007-03-21T23:11:00.000+08:00

I shall update! since there are complaints that my blog died. haha. Well, i just had quite a major hiccup in my life yesterday. Sigh.. Long story, dun wish to talk about it. Anyways, life's kinda boring nowadays.. bball and school take up like my entire life. oh not exactly entire.. haha. At least today things look better. If not i wouldn't have the mood to come and blog already. oh ya, i'm seriously lagging behind in my work lar. Argh.. I go everywhere also sleep leh.. Lectures and tutorials are also under my conquest. This sucks lar. I'm so going to evolve into a mugger after my A divs' competition. I will not allow myself to fall behind. So all u slackers out there, better buck up too!! =D i shall go do something constructive now. And tml i'm ponning school! for the first time.. wahaha

high!!

2006-12-12T23:34:00.000+08:00

I was so happy just now.. haha. Went down to the bball court to play ball.. lolx. i was almost god like lar.. all my fast breaks.. you know wat? the adults were betting which hand i would use to score my lay up.. wtf man.. Although i didn't show any expression, i was damn happy deep down.. whahah. Then i saw this girl who was damn cute.. REally really cute.. sec 1 only. But too bad lar.. lolx. =D

Today was kinda sad. After gym training in sch, i went straight home. coz i had no money to eat my lunch outside.. lols. And home was boring!! Nothing to do at all!! So i went to sleep until like 6 plus before i went to play ball till 10 plus.. MY ankle is still hurting from ytd's slight twist. rarh..

The hols are so going to end in less than 3 weeks time. sigh. time really flies.. wat have i done so far?? nothing.. just play and play and play.. lolx. Gonna be a J1 next year.. =( no more honeymoon period le.. But i will never forget these 2 years..

I'm tired. Gonna go rest. cya around ya? nitex!

p.s tonight was the happiest night of my bball career

Pain.

2006-10-09T18:02:00.000+08:00

LAst 2 days has been so painful. sigh. No one knew how much i went through.. lols. And screw bio man.. totally. I bathe like 5 or 6 times yesterday in order to destress can.. woah.. The amount of freaking stress was like suffocating me. And to add on to that, i was super down also.. Rarh.

Well, at least all was over and the sky regain part of its sunshine.. But i wan the sun to be up there!! after my exams i'm gonna make up for lost time. Sigh. This period of time wasn't really the best of time for me to tide through actually. really. determination and strong willpower, maybe plus abit of painkillers to numb myself. haha.

I guess this last day of preparation is gonna be very irritating.. Can't wait to play tml. It's the last paper dude!! I can't help but feel very moodless to do work. Ok. It's 6pm so i better get going. =D it's the last dash, all the best people!

i'm in the mood!

2006-09-27T20:07:00.000+08:00

haha.. exams are round the corner! sigh.. 2 more days and it's my practical exam! rarh.. It has been 2 years since i entered the ip.. final exam.. well, it's time to put a closure huh? Kinda worried for this exam.. Just hope to get it done and over with and promote to J1.. But it's gonna be like my O' level exam so can't really screw it up badly..

kinda emo nowadays.. just keep thinking of lots of stupid, happy, sad, whatever stuff that has happened over the past 2 years.. i was arranging stuff in my piggybank and i saw the neoprints that i took with my classmates last year.. time flies. people change. for better or for worse? who knows.

I've grown alot. really. i've learned to take things in my own stride and not to rush things. I guess it's just lessons learnt from past experiences and i'm not gonna repeat the same mistakes. well, that's all i have to say for now.. gonna go study.. cya!

today!

2006-09-15T21:06:00.000+08:00

i love the 15th. lols. Although i spent the day sleeping and studying and now maybe going to play ball. But i'm happy, contented. =D Nowadays my life kinda monotonous.. sigh. stupid exams putting so much stress on me. Rarh. Really worried that i wun do well.. someone save me..

a happy day

2006-08-11T00:30:00.000+08:00

the 10th of august rock man! I love the day! It's a day where i was happy and happy and happier than ever. No prize for guessing. =p chances are you wun be able to get it anyways.. Well, for a start, dun watch the movie "see no evil", coz it sucks.. I simply love the day for the way it is. I hope you did too.

crappy day..

2006-08-07T00:15:00.000+08:00

was about to start on my LA assignment when u just have to piss me off.. "get over it" was all it takes. Sorry man.. I 've already gotten over her like damn long ago in case you haven realise it. Block me for all you want coz the feeling is mutual. =) gonna go sleep.. tata..

SV trip

2006-07-28T00:35:00.001+08:00

5th june Day 1

Transit in Taipei wasn't that bad after all.. But it was a 10hour stopover!! Went to a nearby airport hotel for some complimentary stay. Given a chance to eat lunch on our own during the stay. I had a plate of duck rice on ly.. Oh ya, then we went to the roadside stalls.. The smelly toufu was really damn smelly can. Now i undertand wat they mean by smelly.. haha. Really can't stand it.. me and my friends each took a bite and we had to flush it down with bubble tea.. lmao.. Back on the plane at night.. Now have pretty air stewardess whom i manage to take a pic with her at the end of the flight.. It was like 10.5 hours flight can.. Finally reached San Fransisco airport.. It ain't as nice as our Changi Airport.. =p I noticed the cars here are all left-hand drive de.. Traffic was so different too, even the raods, lots of highways and stuff.. Interesting.. It was only a half hour drive to our hotel. It's named Marriott Courtyard. Not a very high class one i would say but nonetheless quite comfortable.. Have to sleep quite early coz i have to wake up at 6.30am tml.. Had a bath, ate a cup noodle, tug in and zzZZZ.

6th june Day 2

Woke up early today since i can't really sleep. Maybe it's like afternoon in singapore when it's like night here.. haha.. Breakfast was nice, esp the omelette. Super filling! FIrst destination was UCLA Berkeley. It's quite cool.. One of my choices for university if i can make it.. But i'm worried my grades will not make it. haha. But people kept on emphasizing that it's not just grades. Sigh.. Next up was lunch. Had a heavy breakfast so decided not to eat much for lunch. Only had a taco. lolx. Next up was the dance studio.. Mothing much to talk bout it since it's quite boring.. Watched a rehersal for a play after that. We are going to watch the play on thursday anyway so alot of people fell asleep.. lols. Then the last stop for the day is Cataphora, a start-up company. Wasn't much interesting.. Only know that it faces lots of obstacles when it first started out. That sums up my day i guess? oh ya, marina plaza for dinner but i dind't eat.. had cup noodles as supper though.. ZzzZ

7th june Day 3

First up, breakfast. Omelette was once again fantastic.. Went down to Delancy street after that. It's a place for ex-drug addicts/convicts. Kinda touching to hear of the wonderful stories of how they work as a community/family. One can turn over a new leaf afterall.. Next was the exploratorium. An american version of the Science CEntre we have in singapore. It was super big and had plenty of fascinating experiments and set-ups. Had agreat time fiddlign with them. It's quite tiring though. Took a photo of an infra-red pic of myself. Oh ya, i almost lost my camera.. lucky this kind caucasian girl guessed i lost something and returned it to me.. haha. Then we had dinner at Union Square. Ate 2 slices of pizza. Their pizza is like 10X better than ours??!! After that is a play called "..." i forget.. haha. WAs so tired that i fell asleep before it started.. Couldn;t concentrate throught.. =( The 15-year old girl was super chio! and hot! Rossi was the name of her! Sigh.. didn't get her photo leh.. wasted.. Cheong back to hotel and here i am.. It's 1am right now.. zzZZ

This is incomplete btw.

random-ness..

2006-07-28T00:32:00.000+08:00

this is totally random.. it's 12.30 right now.. super late can.. Although i'm quite tired, i dun feel like sleeping yet.. wahaha.. Hm.. exams are getting nearer and nearer by the day.. I'm feeling vv scared.. I just hope i could get on to j1.. but at the rate things are going.. hm.. abit challenging.. but i promised myself, i will not let myself down.. Will go mug hard de.. =) for now, i think i shall go lie on my bed.. lols. tata. Nitex!@

=D

2006-07-26T23:06:00.000+08:00

today was a happy day.. wanna know why? coz it was simple and it was pleasant. haha.. not too complicated nor wat. =D feeling happy.. do work! tata..