Hm.. THings in life are just way beyond our control. What others do to you are also not within your control. After being through so much, i just feel that we should learn to take things easy. The harder the situation is, the more u should stay calm and think.. sounds easier than done right? well, personally i've been stabbed before that's for sure.. Who hasn't been stabbed before? Everyone got stabbed and stab people once in a while.. I'm the kind who can tolerate so it doesn't really matters if u stab me lightly or harshly. but should the chance come for me to stab u back, that's it. U're a goner. haha.. so violent right? that's what my "sis" said.. But my tolerance level quite high so it compensates for that.

I'm really thankful i have certain people by my side.. The girl whom i talked bout in my previous posts was one of them. Although things may have hit a harsh state nowadays, i'm glad she was there in the past. Yes, she might have mood swings at times but everyone has it so i'm ok with that. No matter how much u have hurt me, what u said bout me, i never really bear that in mind. So if u know u're the one i'm mentioning about, you are still that special friend to me. :) Then there's my "sis", who never fails to cheer me up.. haha. thankz! We will give our trust a name. My best buddies for doing all sorts of stuff with me, all the dirty, daring, disgusting, exciting things.. Really thank you guys for being there.. And i will remember the days we are together on the court. I shall cut it short, no matter who you are, as long as u have crossed my life, u have impacted me in one way or another, but whether it is a long lasting one, or just a brief one then it varies.

Well, today was an awesome day.. The skit shown was really enlightening. in case you have no idea what i'm talking bout, i watched a mini-skit today that depicts how we teenagers are being controlled by our parents. Kind of reflect abit and feel that maybe sometimes i do things abit the overboard, but that's me.. I shall attempt to change but then it will certainly take a long time.. tata.. gtg and bathe.. then pack bag and sleep. bye people.

I know you would know i'm directing this to you. DO you ever know how much it actually hurts me when u say certain stuff. YOu aren't just a normal girl to me.. YOu know that too. Even in the past i did so much for you and not expecting anything in return, just seeking for your understanding. Sometimes you seem so happy when u're with me, but sometimes you can just happily leave me alone to rot. You are so unpredictable, unfathomable.. I just wish you're much more simpler..

to: the girl..

I guess today's sexuality forum do makes some sense in certain ways. Hm.. I've picked up a thing or 2 even though most of it i have already know long ago. Had all the flashes of memories running through my mind during that period of time. I guess people do change along with time and you have to accept the changes whether you like it or not. Wanted to ask so much today, really alot. BUt i just kept everything to myself and hoping someone would ask what i wanted to know. Unfortunately, no one did.. THen i got the chance to ask something during the follow-up session with mr boy. This was my question, "As a relationship progresses, one party changes and is no longer the person you had liked in the beginning, what actions would be recommended?" Everyone just decided that break up would be the best option available.. If you really think of it, it is but that is if after you tried talking things over and it didn't work.. Had some interesting questions and some really benefit me i think. It wasn't a wasted day after all. I was so tired that i fell asleep at the last part of the discussion.. Lolx. nvm..

Today i encounter something interesting.. Somehow something happened and then it led to something else and on and on.. Chain effect.. well, i'm not really sure what happen though. Saw this girl walking off in a very pissed mood, i chased after her but was told to leave her alone.. I did that although i was right behind her.. Took the same bus but didn't even talk to each other. Any attempts to sound her out was given up when she chose to sit by herself and listen to her mp3 player.. Decided that best option is to leave her alone to cool down.. hope she is feeling better right now.. Went back to ahs to accompany my stupid friend who's leaving again.. Reached home at 7 plus but we had a very frutiful sharing on the mrt.. It was an honest, no lies, no reservations sharing.. Sigh.. Can't believe his leaving.. THur having class gathering to eat with him, super big shot xia..

I'm quite happy seeing that guys in our class are beginning to gel together. We are able to do that mainly because we share one common passion and that drives us towards a common goal. ANd girls, u wun wanna know what izzit.. lolx. Well, but it's good to see an improvement though.. Sometimes i just dun understand the way she does things.. As what you said, she bitches about someone when she's pissed, doesn't say wat's wrong and totally gives attitude.. Well, i guess everyone has their reason for doing things.. Hm.. hopefully she has a good one coz she's been hurting me time and time again.. gonna go bathe then do work.. tata.. bye...

People are at an all time high spastic nowadays.. Ytd was cheonging my LA task coz today was the deadline. LUckily managed to get it done with abit of help from someone.. I dunno if that person is like pissed with me or not. Well, the most i dun ask for her work in the future lor.. THen i did my ss, which is also another thing that needs alot of time to do. Did about half and it was like 2 plus so i decided to go sleep le.. CAn't take it.. Gonna finish it later.

Anyways, first day of school wasn't that bad as i thought it would be. Although the talk was boring, at least we guys get to talk about some stuff that's not covered by the woman. wahaha. I fell asleep like free during the last part of the talk.. I leaned against the cushion and i fell asleep, i tried to seat up straight but i still fell asleep. Haiz.. But overall it's still ok lar..

I have a feeling that i will soon distant myself from this person even though she is quite close to me. I wonder if to her, friends are suppose to help one another in need. While i was so desperate for help, she told me she has to go off.. And she even add in sarcasm.. I felt so hurt at that point of time. Yes, it's my fault that i ask her for help at so late a time. But that's becoz i really dun have time le mah.. Then today, somehow i no longer felt the same towards her as before le.. MAybe to her, i'm also just another guy that's not anyone special so it doesn't matter.. But well, she matters to me coz she's one of the rare few whom i talked to and confide in. Guess things are starting to change bah.. Ms toh's right.. Everyone needs time to find friends, i believe i need time too. sigh.. Another one down... I still have one last person i wanna hold on to, my little fugly sis.. haha. And if given another chance, i would have stayed in ahs. I can say this withough hesitation now.. After being with my sec sch friends for the hols, i felt the feeling that my classmates can never provide.. It really hurts me that i'm placed in an environment where i dun like yet i have no choice but to push on.. What's the point of having friends when they aren't there to share ur joy and pain? REally dun wan to have this mindset that friends in ip are only that superficial.. But the situation really seems so.. OR maybe i'm just being shallow and narrow-minded.. I dun care.. From now on, i shall just be myself, live for myself.. What for try to please ppl when i dun get a single shit back from them.. I always have my sec sch friends to fall back on..

Lots of work to do.. so well, those in the ip, u know i'm a slacker so go ahead and laugh.. Those not in the ip, i'm telling u i regretted. So it isn't a bad thing that u're in mainstream after all. bye..

ok.. Anyways, i went to genting with my friend and his family from tues to thur then to KL and returned on the friday. Bought sneakers, boardshorts, cap, shirts and alot of stuff. REally played and eat alot during the trip. Haiz.. Now it's all back to work already. Get serious boy.. Oh ya, i went for some foot reflexology crap.. hAha.. Abit stupid but quite nice lar.. Anw, the themepark in genting is getting suckier and suckier.. NOt thrilling at all. Watched "mr and mrs smith" there. Wasn't that bad overall but i fell asleep at 1 part.. only 1 part! haha.. Then wat else.. Played pool, billard, arcade.. whatever shit there is to do, i've done i think.. I went to watch this performance which is LIVE and the people really do stunts right before our eyes.. Super nice.. Wun mind going again but it's damn ex and i'm not exactly rich.. Throughout the whole period of time, i dun have my hp with me! haiz.. miss my hp.. Then had to use my friend's hp to send overseas msgs, luckily he nice enough to let me send a few. Hm.. Got some lolipops for ppl that are nicer to me.. haha. And yes, got some extra stuff for my "sis", super lucky lar she..

When i came back on fri, received news that friends are going over to stay over at 1 guy's house. So guess wat, i went too.. Can't miss out the fun.. Was telling pearlyn this "you can always learn knowledge(academics), but you can never learn best friends". It's not always someone gets to play a big part in shaping ur life at one point of time. Well, i wouldn't miss this stay for anything. He's leaving on the 1st july and there's not much time left..

This morning went to marine parade CC to play ball with my friends.. Had to flag a cab in such a busy road and worst still, there were so many ppl vying with us. CAn't stand it.. Where are the cabs when you need them?! Nvm.. We played at the CC and we almost fought with ppl.. lolx. super cool lar.. the oppositions were adults but my friends and i were of adult built so.. haha.. Well, it started off with a bit of nudging and pushing while playing lar.. THen contact get more and more vigourous then my friend can't take it.. So that's what happen.. But didn't fight lar.. COz we suppose to clear the court since there's gonna be a function at 2 i think.. Went east coast park after that.. Did stupid things there lar.. haiz.. so boring but no choice.. church event.. Almost fell asleep while eating my fillet o fish for dinner.. SO tired lar.. And here i am blogging and wasting precious beauty sleep.. Went bedok to play arcade and talk cock in mac.. Wanted to play pool but then underage.. Sianz.. Being under the age of 16 really sucks.. REached home at 12 plus.. sianz.. Damn tired.. Shall end here. And ya, need to get work started. Bye.